spotto: (Sooooolo)
Regrets

1) Waiting five years for a Sayo backstory chapter that never came. She had her introduction chapter and that was the first and only time she had a chapter dedicated to her.

2) Waiting four years for a good Fluttershy episode. She had Hurricane Fluttershy. That's it. I give up. Do not have Fluttershy as a favourite character. Pinkie and Rarity will take her place.

3) Waiting three years for RWBY to be good. Still waiting...

4) Waiting my whole life for the Canucks to win a cup. (They were cupless for the twenty years before I was born too...) A regret that will go on forever.

5) Waiting too long to go to another home game with my dad. We went to one once in 2009, and we lost pretty terribly (led and then gave up the lead) We kept talking about going again, hopefully to a win. Now it's too late. We had seven fucking years to go but never did.
spotto: (koi)
 alt=You might be wondering, "Why are you doing this again?" and "If you are, why not after August" when TH15 is entirely out? Well considering none of the new characters from the demo or the new boss from the new fighter showed up in my top 50-ish list, I don't think too much will change from here to then. What changed from before to now, however? Well, quite a lot. Since quite a lot changed, I figure doing it again is fine and it is not because I have nothing to do because I'm writing this while my friends are waiting for me to play MH4U with them, so...

But I digress! Can you see what massively changed recently? :D? I cannot guarantee such changes will be permanent. After all it has happened quite literally overnight, though I started writing all this a few days back and just continued right about now, so at this point it wouldn't be overnight. Nonetheless, I'm going to go off on a tangent here that is marginally related to the picture on the left, but mostly not really.

I feel like as one grows older one begins to care less about things. Now, the degree of caring is very important. After all, if you start caring about nothing that stops being normal and starts running into say, depression territory or what-have-you, but when we're all adolescents, we tend to care too much. We care far too much what other people think of us, and for some of us academics must be perfect or death! In reality academics didn't really matter until later on in high school and even then one could still get into a prestigious post-secondary institution in a myriad of ways. In fact nowadays with the absurd costs of continuing education it's more cost-effective to delve into something else. But whether or not we find success in these other fields highly, highly vary. Regardless, when one gets older, one cares less.

For instance, this blog. If I cared more, I'd be ranting my pants off and posting here much more regularly than I have like I did frequently when I was younger, but now I usually do not have much to say or much to rant about. At some point you start wondering if there is a purpose to blasting certain things in two-thousand words or longer. It's probably a good exercise in a way, sort of like letting off the steam and working on personal dictation. Yet as I've grown older I've become far less passionate in things. And usually things I'm passionate in are fairly benign run-of-the-mill not especially important in the grand-scheme-of-things kind of topic. Like that image to the left. WHO CARES WHO I LIKE? Is it that important that I show up here and explain to you all lovely readers why so-and-so have shot up my ranks? Not especially! It's mostly an exercise for oneself, splaying out the reasons for such in text and not leaving it to die to the mercy of poor memory. What if five years from now I wonder why on earth i would ever have Sanae third? Was I a madwoman back then? Well now I have this text to fall back on to see why!

But of course there are pros and cons to such a mindset. I truly love being passionate about things. Everyone does. However, there comes a limit to how passionate you should be. Being passionate leads to extreme highs and lows in terms of opinions and emotions. The opposite, being casual, is that you are pleased by smaller things easier, and let down by things less than you normally would, but you would never experience the joys of something you're super into coming true. What if a show you loved to death when you were a child came back on air? You'd be ULTRA-EXCITED and then because you loved it so much, you would be incredibly observant to everything you see on screen. Are the voices still the same? Is the animation still okay? is the writing of the same spirit as it was once before? And if it is, you're elated. You are simply bursting with joy through every seam in your body. A childhood dream, a nostalgic little tidbit of your life has resurfaced, has revived. One cannot possibly describe such euphoria when you're that passionate for such a thing.

However most likely a reboot or a sequel will be terrible, or even if it's decent it will never have the same flavour as what it originally had, so disappointments, even ones not warranted will exist. Being this passionate means every little flaw is all the more magnified, and you, being so hopeful, feel all the more crushed the less similar to the thing it once was, was. You begin ranting, criticizing, maybe even flinging insults you normally never would just because of how betrayed you feel because you are that passionate by that little thing.

If you liked the show when you were young and it came back, and it was pretty similar to how it was beforehand, with some differences you can overlook so you ultimately enjoy it, you're casual about the thing. It doesn't take much to make you happy, but you would never experience that ultimate high you might have if you felt all the more invested. A lot of people say these ultra-dedicated fans are incredibly annoying, but if the person who is ultra-dedicated is happy with where they are, to the point that they do not care how they are thought of by others then they have achieved true happiness, I say. Unfortunately that is not the case most of the time. Such people will be disappointed more often than not, and this phase in their life may end and they may come out of a more aloof person, a casual if you will.

I can describe all of this for something like My Little Pony. When it first came out and I watched it I was ecstatic. What a great show! Every episode is the best! There are no flaws! The writers are the best people in the world and when they go to Valhalla after they've lived incredibly long, storied lives they should be treated to the grandest of beer and the most magnificent of parties for the rest of eternity! Basically normal humans are slammed onto pedestals because they can do no wrong. They've pleased people to the extent that if they do make an eventual mistake, their flawless, perfect image will come crumbling down to the ground. In reality everyone is a normal, flawed human who can make normal mistakes. I, being super passionate about Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy's friendship, was absolutely crushed by Pinkie's depiction in Filli Vanilli. I could not possibly believe she was capable of such insensitivity. Certainly she had displayed traits of such behaviour before, but not to such an abhorrent extent. The fact that Fluttershy's response to this is endless crying and an attempt to literally escape from her friend is treated as comedy personally offended me. I related with Fluttershy's anxiousness and insecurities. For it all to be treated like a joke, for Pinkie's behaviour to only be reacted by being smacked by a newspaper as if she were dog, it was just crushing to that passion of mine. I began ranting; I even flung insults (I don't think on this blog, or if I did not much) to people responsible. That's what happens when you are involved in something that much. Most people just thought, since they either didn't relate or were casual about it, thought the scene was okay and people may have been overreacting. A lot of Pinkie fans did not like her behaviour, including me however. This spawned a few fanfics and ideas that these two could not possibly be great amazing friends had it not been for the existence of the Elements of Harmony, but that idea goes entirely against the whole Friendship is Magic message in the first place. So how to explain what happened?

Well, to explain all we can do is that not every episode is flawless and not everyone is perfect. Someone thought, "Hey this scene would be funny!" and well, it unfortunately did not come off that way for some people. That's just reality. Now, I still watch the show. It's not like I've dropped it or dumped it or whatever, but I no longer think every episode needs to be absolutely perfect. If it isn't, I'm not about to spend hours of my day spewing text on why so-and-so sucks and needs to be better written. I may dislike an episode but I just move on. Shows and stories like MLP change and evolve over time. What was once seen often in season one might not show up as much in season four, and that's okay. Someday, I may stop watching or maybe I'll watch until it inevitably ends, either way the expectations are much lower, but not because the show is worse all of a sudden; the passion is no longer there because I enjoy the show more often when I have a more casual attitude about it. When episodes do come by and happen to be especially good, that's awesome, but no longer do I fall into the extreme lows if something I don't like happens. I mean, I certainly hope Pinkie never acts like that ever again, and that instance of her is the most extreme she ever gets, but you can't predict such things.

This rant just turned into another goddamn Filli Vanilli MLP rant didn't it? I AM SO SORRY. It is SO irrelevant to the picture to the left. So instead of talking about Touhou I'll go into another just-as-irrelevant rant! I stopped watching Achievement Hunter. OH NO. WHAT A TRAGEDY. Perhaps I'll go back to it someday. It's not like some sort of dramatic, angry abrupt stop at consuming their content. It was just a gradual sort of thing. At one point I watched a video they released every single day, then it dwindled until I watched a few videos a week. Just recently I began watching just to bide my time as I played with my hamster. Yes, there's a problem when you simply watch the video to pass time instead of for the purposes of entertainment. Is it because Ray left? That may be a part in it, but I guess their brand of humour and their attitude to gaming and such just became repetitive and old at some point. I did watch their stuff for almost two years after all. A lot of their humour is bashing things, mostly jokingly, but it does feel old after a moment. For instance, I like hockey. They bash the fuck out of hockey whenever it comes up, but I know it's in a joking manner. Recently they played NHL 15, and I watched the first video but for whatever reason I just don't have the desire to watch the second part. I guess even though I know they were joking I got tired of their constant ignorance about a sport I am passionate about.

Another thing is that I've begun seriously watching tons of ASMR. I've become so much more calm and chill because of it and I love that stuff. The topic came up in Achievement Hunter, one member apparently hates it and finds it creepy. That's okay. It's not for everyone. But then it got to the point that they started joking it was a sexual thing somehow? Which is a stereotype I really don't want being spread around at all. They even spoofed an ASMR video by whispering and making tons of innuendoes. Again, they were probably joking, but the hoards of thousands of fans that watch and have no clue what it is will probably think it is just a sexual kind of thing. You get kind of tired when such stereotypes are tossed around. Like every gay person is flamboyant! All girls like shopping and dresses! Yaoi fangirls are perverted lost causes! Fans of ponies are neckbearded manchildren! People on Tumblr are fierce SJWs who have "NO FUN ALLOWED" permanently installed on their lawns! Redditors are just fuckboys who hate women! I SEE THIS CONSTANTLY ON THE INTERNET ALL THE GODDAMN TIME IT GETS OLD GODDAMNIT. And when there are constant jokes and humour meant to shit on people, which I'm fine with honestly, I do love me some South Park. It's just that if such a brand of humour is done in really cheap, direct manner, it's not all too funny anymore. South Park is brilliant because it's written excellently with some great satire. Doing things offensively because it's offensive is not clever whatsoever.

I'm not saying what they did was offensive. God knows there are tons of other things people have concerns about, but it's just in general. You get tired of it and that's the brand of humour they operate on. You go talk to your friends somewhere in a relaxing, open place where you can be yourself, but then you can't because suddenly someone makes a sandwich joke about girls. And you just sit there and take it, but internally you're like "THIS IS FUCKING OLD." I can appreciate smart humour that subverts your expectations. Or puns. The best cheap humour is puns. Whenever someone makes an incredibly ignorant comment about something I don't get angry, I just laugh at them. They're that stupid. It's how people continue living life, by laughing because man do things get old.

Okay that last rant wasn't really coherent whatsoever. I basically just got tired of the "Deal with it" attitude. Like, instead of complaining (well I technically am now but whatever) I'll just stop watching. The passion will be gone, and it has. And despite all my grievances the ultimate reason is that their stuff just got boring. They just play the game now it seems. I don't really laugh anymore. I loved the Minigolf stuff, always laughed at that. Then Ray left and they filmed the rest of that series in a week. While there was some genuine hilarity in the last few videos it felt like a drop in quality because instead of spreading out the content they played it all at once, so everyone remembers how to play the game. It becomes "a bunch of dudes playing video games" instead of "a bunch of entertainers playing video games". Maybe my tastes have matured? Their audience is the teenage audience anyway.

Oh yeah, Touhou.

I guess I am still passionate about some things. I am here ranting after all. So speaking about Reddit, I re-subbed to the Touhou subreddit because I wanted relevant Touhou news. (I'm never going to remember when Reitaisai happens without this!) but notice how I say "re-subbed". I un-subbed because they kept posting NSFW art or questionable art. I was really hoping such content was moved to some other subreddit, and when I re-subbed I didn't see any, but then after a week of course all that came crashing back down. Luckily actual NSFW art doesn't have a thumbnail, so I can usually ignore them, but questionable art does not get tagged like this, so I'll be scrolling down the front page and suddenly, someone's butt.

Okay, one reason to love Touhou is the designs, in particular how non-sexual these designs are. Certainly they're wearing very elaborate clothing one would not really expect of the time they live in. (I mean, exposed armpit mikos? Lol) But it's not anything that's really revealing and it's really nice for a change. Of course then the fighting game comes out and they decide the religious nun character should have bouncy boobs, and when she rides a motorcycle a rather revealing biker outfit during her special, which you most likely will miss considering how fast the picture comes by, but still. Nonetheless, I can tolerate it. I did after all start liking Touhou after SOMEHOW enduring the blatant and vast fanservice that dominated all of Negima, what with being an ecchi. I didn't complain too much about it (except when the proportions were incredibly stupid) because if I'm reading an ecchi I might as well be expecting fanservice, so if I see a small amount of it in other things it's not a huge deal. But actual porn or questionable fanart of normally very tastefully-dressed Touhous bother me. (Though I do recall complaining about said bouncy boobs. Seriously, Byakuren of all people!?!? I know the rest aren't as well-endowed, but really?)

But it's all about choosing to see things. You see I frequent Danbooru because I'm insane. I am well aware Safebooru exists, but the translations/comments (or at least the comments) won't exist on Safebooru because sadly, not as many people browse such a site. Now you might be wondering why the comments are so necessary that I'd stay on the site like so, but you don't exactly realize how insane I am. I enjoy reading comments to the extent that I read Youtube comments. I AM THAT INSANE. Because of such, I keep any complaints I might have about Youtube comments to a minimum (do you see a rant about that here??) because if I'm willingly reading about them, complaining about it is utterly pointless. I did install Alien Blue to replace Youtube comments with Reddit comments (which contrary to popular belief is not always better) but if the video does not have many Reddit comments or none at all, you damn well know I'm reading those horrible Youtube comments. So yes, you'd think seeing questionable content would not bother me. After all, I HAVE YEARS OF NEGIMA EXPERIENCE.

But Reddit is a place where I don't want to see such content, like at all. It's a place I don't expect it. It's a place free of such things. That's why a NSFW filter exists! But then questionable stuff gets through anyway, and again you don't have to click it! BUT IF IT SHOWS UP IN A THUMBNAIL, WHAT DO YOU DO!? WHAT DO YOU DO!? That's why I unsubscribed to r/WTF. (Why the fuck is that subreddit a default one anyway!?) Hell, I actually expect it on Tumblr because of how Tumblr is organized. Unless you specifically only follow strictly SFW people (which I don't because too many cool people to follow) there is always a chance you'll see NSFW on the dash. That's why I never Tumblr in public, but Reddit, ironically, IS THE ONE PLACE I DON'T WANT TO SEE SUCH THINGS. And thus this dilemma.

Good lord I'm still not talking about the sort.

Well.

It's all very simple really. I've only been paying attention to canon Touhou stuff until recently, so Miko returning in ULiL and her badassery has promoted her to first place, while Keine I still like as much. She just hasn't done anything so she's stagnant. Sanae is playable again in TH15: Rabbit Season! Yay! But that's not at all the reason she's up there, or any other character might be so high up. As you can see, UFO as a whole except Byakuren dropped out of my top ten, which is a sad depressing thing. I truly enjoy UFO. I'm just still forever annoyed that Stage 5 bosses like Shou and Orin are left to the side because they are youkai cats. SUCH DISCRIMINATION. At first the rule was only humans can be playable, but then Reisen became playable in TH15 (probably because she's relevant and also she is for some reason identifying as human in this game, idk) and Seija also became playable despite being a youkai. So clearly being a cat is a bad thing in the Touhou universe. I guess I'm just disappointed that due to Shou being really just a figurehead and all of her power canonically coming from that pagoda, there is no reason for her to be playable in a fighting game or be relevant in too much. This is unfortunate. Shou has all the wonderful design to look utterly badass while fighting, but I guess her looks are just for...Shou.

I do not regret that.

Anyway that includes the rest of UFO not in the game. Ichirin actually went up, from 50th-ish to 30th-ish so it's not like everyone went down! I still like Murasa and Nue but they've also become far less relevant. Nue's involved in a million other things now, like hanging out with Koi and Flan (fanon, but still) or having hijinks with Mamizou or being compared to/drawn with Seija due to design similarities (all fanon! But they're not doing much in canon anyway so eh). Meanwhile Murasa is now commonly mistaken for a Kancolle character. SUCH A SAD FATE. Or at least when I go "OH MY GOD THAT THUMBNAIL OF MURASA LOOKS COO--it's a Kancolle character. Fuck everything."

Okay I'll stop avoiding the obvious.

AYASANA IS THE WINK OF A WIND GOD

....wow the translation of that sounds awkward.

Yep! It's just like how KeneMoko propelled Keine to god-status. I have recently adopted a new wonderful pairing because I am a shameless hardcore shipper who despite the numerous rants (like that RWBY rant where I declared I stopped shipping...and now I have an actual OTP in that fandom >_>) will always return to these seemingly adolescent roots. I'M SORRY. IT IS HARD TO DENY THE CUTENESS. You see when Aya isn't portrayed as the most annoying bird in existence and when Sanae isn't portrayed as the most manic youkai exterminator in existence, they're actually quite nice characters who are really fucking cute together. Like holy crap. This is oddly enough not unexpected. I recall years ago being bored and going through the Aya and Sanae tags because I WAS THAT BORED, and I actually went through all the AyaSana stuff despite having little investment in the pair. It was cute enough for me to LOOK AT EVERYTHING. Now I randomly returned to it (I don't know how. I, on a whim, purchased an Aya keychain recently and now it sits on my desk IN FRONT OF ME for some reason and the figure MUST'VE HYPNOTIZED ME TO look up Aya things) I also blame Wind God Girl. I think I was listening to it and decided to look up Aya stuff. ALL OF IT IS HAS CONTROLLED MY BRAIN.

I say this because I've always liked Sanae. She's my favourite playable. I always main her. THEN AYA, OUT OF NOWHERE. The only reason she had not swapped with Sanae's place is because I've liked Sanae longer and until my preferences have been solidified some I'm not allowing some random character to stick its face so high up so soon. It'd be weird! But if all of this love remains and doesn't die off eventually then technically I am once again shipping another reporter character... hm. I never was too fond of Momiji/Aya, or Aya/Hatate. I tried to get into Sanae/Reimu but I don't find Reimu shippable personally. I AM ALSO OPEN TO SHIPPING EITHER OF THEM TO ALICE. Because Alice is great. I still love her. She's just ninth because...reasons.

BY THE WAY I WROTE ALL THAT ABOVE LIKE TWO WEEKS AGO AND JUST RECENTLY FINISHED THE SONG SORT AFTER A WEEK. Click the image for the massive full sort. It took that long, though admittedly there were days I didn't touch it at all and days where I spent like 2-3 hours. Some days I just did it for like fifteen minutes, but at around 40% in I finished the rest all in one day in around 3 and a half hours. By "finished" I mean rushed, so that led to multiple music casualties, wonderful underrated or usually amazing songs that are sadly lower on the list because I liked one song better than it but didn't like THAT song better than others despite probably liking the casualty better than the songs that I liked better than the song I liked better than it. Did you get that? Was that confusing? Nonetheless I'll list a few casualties and a few surprising songs I don't listen to very often that happen to be casualties but need a listen because damn they are just that good. Oh and one thing about the character sort which I did a few weeks back....I did say things might change after a while and it did! I'd probably swap Sanae and Aya. That's about it. THE EVIL KEYCHAIN THAT SITS ON MY DESK UNLIKE ALL MY OTHER FIGURES HAS TAKEN TOTAL CONTROL OF MY BRAIN. This all happened due to an impromptu purchase of an Aya keychain. All of this. The sudden Touhou takeover of my blog despite several rants being entirely unrelated, but still!

I'd also like to mention two other recent events, such as MLP's 100th episode which was pretty much a fanservicey (not in that way) love letter to the fans and that the Stanley Cup has been won by the Chicago Blackhawks...again...for the third time in six seasons! Egads! That just means they not only have a really strong team but really strong scouting and management to maintain such a successful team for so long. At this point they might as well be called a dynasty, perhaps not the crazy Montreal Canadiens of old or the Gretzky Oiler days, but at least on par with or even better than those dominant teams of the 90's (like the Avalanche and the Penguins). Meanwhile my Vancouver Canucks have nothing to show for in forty-four years. I dread whatever decision our management makes for the upcoming draft because we are once again (like a tradition it seems) deciding on two goalies with bright futures and one of them is my favourite player. I most certainly hope they will make the right choice but after all these years following this team I'm very prepared for crushing disappointment and it's just getting really old. I'm to the point I may consider some other team if they keep doing things like trading away favourite players or making mindnumbing decisions. How long can this loyalty last? It's like my rant earlier in this post. If I were a casual and only cared when my team was doing really well maybe this wouldn't be a problem but it is because of passion, passion which as time goes by feels more and more misplaced. PLEASE DON'T DO WHAT I THINK YOU WILL DO.

If they do, well I'll be here on that day, either ranting or just deflated.

As for the one hundredth pony episode...wow. It's going to fly over really casual fans' heads unfortunately. Those who are only here for the Mane Six and haven't participated in the fandom and how often they write, draw, and make videos of various background ponies will be lost. Derpy (or Muffins if the credits are of any indication) is the most well-known one even for the casual fans but how many people I wonder will get Doctor Hooves or understand why the hell it seems like Lyra and Bonbon are a little more than friends, or why the hell Bonbon is out of nowhere a secret agent or remember who Steven Magnet is or realize the significance of his name or remember Octavia? Aside from Derpy there's Vinyl who has a few toys of her that's more exposed than the most (she was a McDonald's toy once I believe) and she had a sizable role in the movie so Vinyl and Derpy will probably be the ones those who aren't super invested will get, but still the majority of the episode will go WHOOSH over their heads.

I've never been the hugest fan of the background ponies. Unlike say, a minor character, background ponies don't really speak and are really only there to make the scenery look more crowded. However instead of say a bunch of completely grey/black people some cartoons and Anime might do, ponies happen to be multicoloured and therefore several will end up with rather distinct designs despite being in the background, so people notice them and start making up stories for them. I unfortunately need a little more than that to like them. For instance Touhou has tons and tons and tons of characters, but since you face a majority of them in battle through the game, you get to see their danmaku patterns, their spellcard names, their dialogue, see any potential backstory in the manual, listen to their theme which is usually indicative of their personality, and then you can go from there to establish who they are and if you like them or not. THEN the fanon comes in and does whatever they want with them with very, very, very mixed results. I didn't mind these characters as say, minor characters or side characters in fanfics I read, seeing as I usually search up something like I dunno, a Pinkie Pie story (there's an Octavia story somewhere in that recommendation list) but seeing them with this much spotlight in canon? Now this is a surprise!

Quite a surprise in fact, that because of this very episode I liked all these characters more than I ever did before. That's all I needed to start giving them a chance. Actually, the Rainbow Rocks movie had a little scene involving Lyra and Bonbon and I was like "Well, these two get shipped extremely often in the fandom and they have an awfully close piano playing scene here" which made me overjoyed for some reason. Then now, in episode 100 we have them actually talking and saying things like "SUCH BEST FRIENDS" while their actions speak just a little further than mere best friends...

AND THIS LEADS ME TO SOMETHING I'VE BEEN WANTING TO RANT FOR A WHILE.

When I was younger and involved in the shipping community, I understood what most people said when people didn't want things shoved in their face. You know, like ponies. That may be the reason some people dislike the phenomenon (among other things anyway) but then, this perspective soon changed. Not so much for something fairly minor like an interest in ponies, which frankly should not be shoved into people's faces because well, it is ultimately just a TV show, but something a little more significant like, shipping is not something I agree on. Do you know why? Sure, the hordes of fangirls and fanboys with their OTPs charging down the halls clinging onto every tiny little scene may be annoying and there might be the dreaded ship wars that make most fans hate their own community, but by god, if the show has a scene between two ponies that is OBVIOUSLY hinting at something more, is it really "shipping goggles" to see more? Because, it's not shipping that's the "annoying problem" about these people. Saying that a scene like Lyra and Bonbon is just there to please shippers without outright confirming anything isn't merely "fanservice"...it's a lot less shallow than that.

Perhaps it's due to being on Tumblr so long, but seeing as most people I follow on Tumblr fall on a spectrum, their posts that continually fill my dash day-by-day depicting the things people on a spectrum must go through all the time really changes your mind, nevermind how I'm still fucking confused where I fall in this spectrum. A friend of mine is asexual for example, and she's told me a few times of her grievances with people who do not seem to understand this concept of asexuality. Apparently, someone doesn't like sex. They don't like it at all. They have no desire to be with someone. They do not have such carnal instincts as others. They are literally affecting no one else by not liking this. There's plenty of people who live through life single for reasons like this or others, but because our society is driven so much by the norms of a boy liking a girl, someone's just gotta bother my friend about this all the time or the topic or something subtle or subconscious always pops up. Like maybe someone will ask you who you like, and you say "no one" but they refuse to take this as an answer because they're so used to relationships in your life. My best friend for instance has a mother who keeps asking her to get a boyfriend, and well, if you told that lady you either didn't want one or preferred a significant other of another gender that must be hell to go through.

Now you're wondering "Well Spotto, if you fall on this spectrum why aren't you explaining what you go through everyday too?" While my parents have touched on the topic occasionally they seem to have stopped asking this question, of when I'll get hitched, probably because either they think I'm a lost cause (lol) or well, my brother who's eight years older than me happens to be gay and has gone through this before with my parents, which I've witnessed, and since he hasn't had one single friend beyond a friend at all, I think their traditional expectations have nosedived. I'm blessed my brother took the brunt of it all. It also helps that I'm not out probably because I DO NOT HAVE ANY CLUE. So there.

How does this relate to shipping you ask? Well, people always complain that shippers are in every fandom and ruining everything, taking over other lovely discussions like debating on lore or character analysis for instance, and oddly enough most shippers seem to ship same-sex. Why is this? The 100th episode showcased a fucking wedding between a girl and boy donkey, I mean jack and jenny, and no one cares. Not a single person is going "Wow why are they shoving these two in my face?!?!?!" nor did anyone bat an eye at the Canterlot Wedding (except for people who think brothers who pop out of nowhere and alicorns popping out of nowhere are bullshit, but that's besides the point) but two characters who aren't even the main characters who show up in the background together a lot, and now that they are given more attention thanks to the fandom have some scenes where they seem to get along real well, apparently it's shoving it into their faces if we proclaim our OTP has been canonized or something. Apparently we CANNOT say they are really together, (even the show itself can't outright say it) despite all indication otherwise because that's just "desperate shippers with shipping goggles" or people "looking into it too much" and "tons of friends act like this all time!" NOT IN THIS SHOW THEY DO NOT! I have not seen a single instance where some other group of friends gave each other bedroom eyes, held their jaws in their hooves, or smooshed cheeks together like Lyra and Bonbon does! And if the first thing did happen it's a freeze-frame shot of a pony blinking instead of prolonged dreamy eyes! But no, instead of "YAY MY LITTLE PONY HAS A CANON GAY COUPLE" it's controversial and AMBIGUOUS!!

Like, I have complained about shippers overtaking something before. iCarly for example is 100% shippers and no one at all cares about anything else. MLP is not like this. There's lots of shipping yes, but there's a HUGE amount of stories, fan videos, music, and art all about comedic moments with one character or a video devoted to Luna and Celestia's past or an askblog about the CMC's adventures or the Mane Six in a huge fantasy fairy tale fighting an all-out-war! Of all things MLP does NOT have an over-abundance of shipping! But two background characters often shipped and usually having funny background events are given a few of these scenes and suddenly we're looking too hard and are too desperate and they're just friends! YES. LYRA AND BONBON ARE BEST FRIENDS. SUCH GOOD GOOD FRIENDS. THEY ARE SO CLOSE AND GET ALONG SO WELL. BEST FRIENDS AND BEYOND ARE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE!

The whole point is, we can have weddings and freakin' Twilight being paired with a random high school boy not of her own native species in an alternate universe, but a few scenes edging on the line of two ponies of the same sex and suddenly AMBIGUOUS CONTROVERSY. You know what I think about these people? Fuck these people. They are the reason our society isn't as progressive as it should be. They are the reason thousands of people went up and arms about Korrasami, which I know nothing about and is possibly something that could've come out of nowhere, I wouldn't know since I don't watch the show, but by god at least let people BE HAPPY that they can watch a show where there are people just like them in there, and it's normal! Because people on a spectrum have to watch shows and movies and read books where straight people literally have sex (yes I read this on a post) and no one bats an eye, but someone who MIGHT HAPPEN TO BE gay exists and everyone blows a fuse. Seriously, FUCK YOU.

I'm sorry. I was just super happy about the 100th episode (like there are things that felt a bit much but still) and went around reading tons of reactions and such and like half of them was about denying Lyra and Bonbon. People saying "the ship is sunk" because they mentioned being best friends like eight hundred times. Normally people don't mention they're the best of friends a bunch of times in a row. It was likely the writers throwing those lines in there tons of times to get what their actions were like through censors. Even if it was a joke on shippers (which it could've been) they threw in Lyra and Bonbon very closely piano playing in the movie which wasn't at all a scene make to point fun at something, so I'm inclined to believe the consistency of these two scenes existing means the writers actually want to include something like a gay couple in their show too, even if it's in a stealth way that doesn't officially announce it so. After all, these writers live in very open, liberal areas (California) and the animators are in freakin' CANADA. Unfortunately for a lot of people unless you blatantly show them on a giant billboard that reaches the heavens that two characters of the same gender are together, they will deny until the end of time. FRIENDS, you say. This is also a reason there aren't a lot of male-female friendships in media either. I have lots of friends who are guys, but when I go on Reddit for instance, for all the people there in that community, it seems like being friends with someone of the opposite gender is a MYTH or something considering some of the comments and questions I've seen. Christ on a fiddlestick.

And I know why they think it's a myth because this whole stupid "friendzone" thing is so prevalent. It completely erases the importance of friendship. Why can't we be friends? Why don't you want to be friends? Why is it "BE MY GIRLFRIEND OR BE NOTHING"!? Why is this such a thing in our society, our culture? It's like someone sees someone else who is attractive and suddenly they MUST skip that whole friendship thing or undermine it because hanging out with someone because they are cool just can't be a thing if you happen to be attracted to them! I SWEAR!

I want to throw things through my window right now. These things are just so infuriating.

With that out of the way, let me fall on the other line for once.

If you've read this blog a lot (and I don't know why you do I write mountains of text, like this post) but if you've read a whole bunch of it you'll know I'm not some person who's wholly against like sexuality and hates it in every single medium. I see it way too often but I'm not like, asexual or anything like that (I think? Blah I don't know) So even though if I see a character I like dressed very provocatively for the billionth time and want to fling glass shards at whoever thought another one of these images was a good idea, there are times where I welcome such a thing. It's like how you ask a guy if they like, say this part of the body more or the other. Say some people like broad shoulders on a man, or the obvious "I like big boobs" people, or what have you. I have this too. I absolutely love navels. If a girl has her stomach showing I will never be complaining. I just said girl without thinking too. Guys' stomachs are okay (well, you might be like "WHAT ABOUT ABS" and abs are cool, but I actually just like flat smooth stomachs more than anything. Besides for a guy I prefer like, pronounced eyebrows and jaw-lines over the stomach) But all of this is entirely appearance-based. If I ever like someone it'd probably be personality above all because well, in reality you gotta be compatible with that person right? If they make you laugh and are a charming, nice person, the looks really don't matter in the end.

I mean, yes, I am saying this on a blog without that much experience on the thing so maybe it's two-faced or blatant lies. But really, if I happen to like someone thanks to their personality, they're a lot cuter to me than they ever would be normally all because of that lovely personality so while yes, obviously looks will be in play, it's really not the biggest thing whatsoever.

Now where was I?

OH RIGHT THE SORT HA HA HA.

So, like I said many paragraphs ago, I did a music sort too! It took a while. The reason I rushed it all today was because leaving Chrome open with a game was causing graphical glitches (among other things, I'm looking at you Steam!) so I wanted to close Chrome...except I had this sort up and if I closed it I wouldn't be able to continue where I Ieft off, so I decided to just do it all at once, get it done. This of course led to many songs I do like quite a bit far lower than they should be due to my stubborn lack of choosing tie, and my tastes being all over the damn place. Also, the first four PC-98 games were sadly excluded because I thought some of the best PC-98 songs were all in Mystic Square. I forgot Mima was a playable character, not a boss in Mystic Square so her theme wouldn't be in it. I also thought Luize was Elly, and confused their themes together. Luize is in Mystic Square, but Bad Apple, the song I wanted, belonged to Elly who was instead in Lotus Land Story. Also other cool songs like Strawberry Crisis were left out as well so those are some unfortunate casualties of this sort. I'm never doing it again; it takes way too long, but I do love those songs. However including Mystic Square made me realize where some remixes came from (I've neeeeever played the PC-98 games ok) and I found other songs that sounded quite good I didn't really listen to much before. Unfortunately one of these was quite the casualty, the stage one theme of Mystic Square called Dream Express. Since I was rushing I was unfortunately judging a lot of songs I didn't know as well on like, the first few seconds of the song so I could move on, but this theme is really damn good. A lot of Touhou songs do have some long intros or take a while to get to the good stuff. This is why Last Remote is ninth. I love Last Remote, but it takes ages to get to the catchy melody part. Meanwhile something like Extend Ash is good the whole way through or Little Princess' lead up fitting really well with the song.

If I listed these songs manually Dream Express would likely be in my top 50 or even top 30 but due to my rushing it is a sad 233rd. -_-

There are a lot of these. I dunno if there are any in particular I still remember, but something like Wriggle's stage theme is really low, or Yukari's IaMP theme is really low, etc. (It didn't read as "Yukari's theme, just Shrine theme or something so it didn't click to me automatically it was Yukari's other theme, so being some random IaMP theme it dropped like a rock). Despite ticking off arranges, there was a particular game that remixed its opening for all the pre-battle themes (or most anyway) which is SWR. Its title theme is remixed from IaMP's title theme and Soku's title theme is remixed off it as well, but wow every damn pre-battle theme being a remix was annoying. I like the song sure but I didn't want a song to be 13 spots lower than it should be because I voted for the title themes and all its remixes to be near the top. (The Soku version is in my top ten; if I had done this my top 20 would be just THIS SONG'S REMIXES D<) so there was that.

Oh and even though no MoF songs made it to my top ten (partly due to casualty) it was by far the hardest game to judge. I love EVERY SINGLE song. Any MoF song not in the top 30 was a casualty. Even though some themes are above others they're pretty much all ties in my heart. There were also songs voted in spite. A prominent one is Sanae's theme, Faith is for the Transient People. You see, Twitch Plays Pokemon recently did a Touhoumon run and Sanae was their starter. Someone suggested doing a remix/mashup of the themes of their six champion Touhoumons, but adamantly deemed Sanae's stage theme as superior, so it ended up in both mashups that existed. The first one that was posted only had the stage theme and not the boss theme and even though I DO AGREE the stage theme is really good and is probably better than the boss theme, I have always associated Sanae with her boss theme because IT IS HER BOSS THEME and it's pretty distinct, so that peeved me off. The second mashup had both, and this was nice. Unfortunately this happened again with MIMA. Apparently Mima's stage theme or second theme or whatever is superior to Reincarnation. No matter how good a theme it might be (I listened to it, it didn't catch on with me at all) REINCARNATION IS A CLASSIC! It's a song I instantly associate Mima with, so I was just full of petty spite at the end and when it came to this sort, though Reincarnation was unfortunately not included I fucking voted for Faith is for the Transient People over Sanae's stage song, BECAUSE FUCK YOU that's what!

I mean I love Nostalgic Blood of the East faaaaaaaaaaar more than Plain Asia for Keine, but if someone uses Plain Asia for Keine instead of Nostalgic Blood I won't mind whatsoever because Plain Asia is her actual boss theme. That is the one associated with Keine the most .It is her theme. Stage themes technically shouldn't even be associated with any character; it's only ZUN trying to set the atmosphere while you kill faeries heading to the next boss. Maybe they can be applied for midbosses that have no other themes, but really.

As for unexpected results, well...IN having three entries to MoF having none in the top ten was a surprise. Of course, I really love Extend Ash and Nostagic Blood, but I underestimated how much I loved Lunatic Princess. Those Princess songs man, they're always so damn good. The problem is MoF and SA both killed each other and themselves when it came time to fight against other games' songs because I love the music from both so bad. Those wonderful years of MoF and SA coming out were imo the pinnacle of Touhou music. While music before then was great and music after is still good, the best came in those years. I love pretty much every song from both their games but MoF does edge out SA.

I've always said Emotional Skyscraper is my favourite Touhou song, but apparently I have eight billion remixes of it on my phone and have heard it too damn much, so it's sadly now fourth. :C

Anyway I should probably post this and not leave it up for a week for when I want to add MORE rants making this even longer. I shall end with a playlist of my apparent top 31 touhou songs according to this sort, just for anybody who can't recognize the song itself from the name. Why is it 31? Because if I made a list of them all no one would listen to it all, not even me! Why 31 in particular? BECAUSE FAITH IS FOR THE TRANSIENT PEOPLE! SPIIIIIIIIITE!!!!!!!!!!!

eh

May. 13th, 2015 09:30 pm
spotto: (Q_Q)
Aha! You might think, "this blog is dead!" But you are wrong! I've been maintaining my pony fanfiction collection post!

Yes that's about it.

And though I do often say "I don't read" I do in fact read. It's that instead of professionally written publicly acclaimed published novels it's usually...amateur blurbs of text written by adult miniature horse fanatics. You can see why I don't tell people I read. I also occasionally read RWBY stuff, but not much these days. And while a majority of them would and probably never should be published, there have been stories sitting around the internet for eyes to read for free that I've found better than novels I've actually read. So there's that.

Speaking of ponies, I have also been watching season five which may or may not drive me to maintain my episode ranking post which is no longer glued to the top of the blog, but that depends if the show entices me enough to care. I've been watching it very casually like a normal person, so my expectations are down and I just laugh at all the simple little pieces of plot or humour that is shown. No over-thinking or over-analysing whatsoever. Because of this, certain episodes that have technically been inconsistent in terms of character have mostly been glossed over by my brain. Sure, I can rant about Rainbow Dash's absurd behaviour in that one episode where Tank is dying but not really at all, but I found that crying scene far too entertaining and amusing to care. The only thing I'd even point out at this time is that the episode came out the day the Canucks were knocked out of the playoffs and that very episode had a hockey reference with some background ponies in suspiciously-coloured jerseys. An anti-fan would say it's a curse, but I'd just say it's a funny coincidence. (Well, not at the time when I was super bummed out my team was knocked out of the playoffs, but you get the point)

I may or may not return to this blog to rant about hockey. It depends on what moves are made (or not) near or after the draft or free agency. The team's management has been making some rather iffy and unsettling decisions, and they're hinting at making a pretty horrible one sooner or later. I hope those are all rumours or overblown tabloids and they won't make what will definitely be a very unpopular move, but if it happens...I'll be here, heartbroken and yelling.

 In Touhou news, the demo for Touhou 15 came out recently as well as the sequel to Hopeless Masquerade, Urban Legend in Limbo. Suffice to say all my previous combos have been ruined and I have to re-learn Miko all over again. On the bright side with the popularity system no longer in play I can't be ruined in my blue cape state...on the not-quite-so-bright side, my red cape advantage has been taken away as well. Now Miko can still buff, but red or blue are different sorts of buffs which the opponent can choose themselves. So for instance if I prefer melee'ing with Miko, my opponent may choose my range buff to keep my melee at bay or visa versa. Ah well, hopefully I'll get a handle on things.

Unfortunately my gaming time has been entirely engulfed by MONSTER HUNTER 4U, the GREATEST GAME EVER MADE. I am not exaggerating; this is the type of game I've always wanted to play but never knew existed. It's co-op, so while I do enjoy competitive games the whole feeling of defeat and hopelessness to constantly losing to all your peers is absent. It is instead replaced with the fear of inadequacy. Will I drag my friends down while we attempt to defeat this beast and ruin the fun for us all? Surprisingly this feeling hasn't popped up all too often. The community (most of it, anyway) and my friends do not care if we have a bad game or bad run or even a bad day. It's the type of game where even one mistake can lead to disaster, so being so worked up about such things would pretty much ruin the feel of the game anyway, so that's great! (Despite this I'm pretty sure I subconsciously do everything in my power to not die) It also has a sort of hack and slashly feel, but not the Dynasty Warriors feel where you're practically invincible because you're wrecking entire hordes of bad guys with one slice. How do I describe this? It's sort of like an action RPG I guess? In regular RPGs you just press buttons and your character does the move, but there's no reflexes or reactions involved, it's entirely tactics based. I'm not a huge fan of such games. While here, I can control my destiny depending on where I move, how I dodge, when I attack, how I attack, where I'm positioned, etc. That type of gaming is why I enjoy fighting games a lot of the time or heck even shooting games if a majority of them weren't in first person. (Curse you vertigo!)

Obviously the one exception is Pokemon, but that's part-nostalgia, part-formula that I've run through over and over again and will never get old, and the tactics of Pokemon are actually some I do enjoy and am very familiar with, so that one aspect of brutal competition amongst my friends remains. Unfortunately in this type of scenario by the end of the game there will be at least one person sad. They will be sad because they were the one who lost the most and therefore given the title of draft scrub. On the other hand there will also be one person triumphant, proud they have attained their grand title of Draft Champion for this round and to carry on their victories as time goes by. This would be all okay if we were all equal in skill and ability in the game, but alas we are not. So there will be certain people who win all the time and others whose turn at the top of the podium is once-in-a-blue-moon. I am a part of the latter group more than the former, but I salute those who continue to play despite rarely being on the podium. I'm not sure if it's in a sense of wishing to improve and to one day usurp those who often have the Spinda Crown, or they genuinely find the game fun win-or-lose. The point is the feeling of defeat sucks, but to keep on playing regardless is pretty cool. However there will come a point for me personally that if I lose constantly and never win, that the joy of playing the game may be lost. People do always say it's not always about the winning, but sometimes you gotta taste victory to keep going y'know?

Which is why ULiL has been pretty frustrating lately. I haven't touched HM in literal years. They took away Miko's amazing directional swords that I combo so often with. Even people who barely play this game at all can beat me. The feeling of all that accomplishment, no matter how little it was (being able to combo in a fighting game is HUGE for me. For veterans it's no big deal, the whole point of the game and the core, but for me to actually combo is a huge feat since I usually am discouraged before I end up learning anything) Certainly I have more experience in this type of fighting game format, but yet I cannot beat those who've just picked it up. Perhaps because my own personal gaming prowess is low, but you'd think that experience would speak for something. Then there's people who root against you because obviously you're the one with the experience, so you're expected to win. To not do so at all just makes it feel that much more pitiful. 

Oh well, I suppose if I ever take time away from MonHun I could work on my Miko, but starting all over again and a lot of moves I'm used to completely different really isn't encouraging. On the other hand the game just came out, so I'm probably overreacting to the extreme.

As for anything else? There are certain topics I may wish to speak about, but probably to a person present instead of no one/myself on this mostly abandoned blog. I'm still a big fan of RWBY and Roosterteeth in general, but the feeling has been waning lately. Certain recent events have led to employees leaving, so the company itself has a much different outlook to me these days. I'm watching Ray's stream a few times a week and take a few days longer to get to some Achievement Hunter videos. Seeing Minecraft or GTA or even some other game pop up in my subscription box doesn't lead me to clicking it immediately with glee as it used to. I'm mostly using it as a way for time to go by as I play with my hamster and even then I can watch literally anything else to do that. (I'm been watching a lot of Nerdcubed lately because he's playing Cities Skylines, which is a game I'm very interested in) I guess part of the problem is aside from Ray leaving that I rarely play the games the AH people play. I don't own the fancy expensive consoles. I instead play PC games and stuff on my 3DS. Aside from Ryan the group seems pretty against PC Gaming in general and Nintendo hates the entire Let's Playing community. That takes a chunk out of games I'm familiar with. About the only thing I click with glee are the Minigolf Let's Plays because it's quite possibly my favourite series from that group. I know they also recently acquired Funhaus, another Let's Playing group with a much different editing style, but I watched some and couldn't get into it. Their clickbait titles annoy me as well. (Their office tour video was hilarious, but I find all the RT office tour videos out of this world so it's not anything that stands out)

And RWBY? Well I mean, with tragedy falling upon the creator it's made the show all the more uncertain. I enjoyed some bits of the two seasons but I feel like I'm only here for parts of the fandom and a stubborn clinging to Weiss as a character. It feels like aside from Monster Hunter I need to get into something new that I would actually enjoy with all my bated breath, and not immediately revert to some disappointment I rant about for a few months before losing hope into anything. It's sort of depressing.

But hey, that's the sort of update I usually put out on this website. Not like, real life issues or anything. P:

If it helps to know about me, I'm feeling oddly woozy with a weird pain in my head at the moment. The last few days have been a haze. I just feel so out of lately. I wonder if I'm getting sick? Ah well.

This has been Spotto!
spotto: (Q_Q)
Nonetheless, in the sense of tradition, I updated my murals crappily printed and taped to wall images from the internet. Have a looksee under the cut!

very large images )

spotto: (Stage One.)
Tolerance.
 
There was a saying somewhere, in sometime, at someplace that in order to become successful in life or to rise up in the ranks of business...we had to practice tolerance.
 
Because that is how life is like, we are not going to run into people who are pleasant to converse with or be in close proximity of at every facet of our lives. In fact, people who we initially are wary of may turn out to be the best people in your lives. Basing everything on previous judgments may not always be in one's best interests. It's how the world rolls on, always throwing us twists and turns to brighten up the corners of our eyes so maybe, just maybe, we won't miss something we really wouldn't want to miss.
 
Yesterday I returned from watching the hockey game to find out that one of my friends was a fan of a very hated rival team. Immediately as my own team was mentioned, flurries of insults and past unpleasant memories were brought up of the histories I experienced watching my home team go through. I had not said a thing to initiate this. It had already begun when my other friend mentioned my team, only to comment on the game itself and funny coincidences when he actually watched. The moment I read those messages, clearly flinging hate towards my way for daring to be a Canucks fan, I had only one urge but to fight back. 
 
Except that was not how I wanted to be. 
 
There is something I truly hate about hockey rivalries or of any sport really. At the same time, this aspect of being a fan is something many, many others may relish in. I can see that, defending your team from rival fans and blasting insults back in forth in some sort of heated passionate dispute could be a way of defending one's honour perhaps. However I never really wanted to be a part of that. To do so I never participated in forum discussions and often didn't even bring up the topic of hockey except to neutral parties who would nod at my nonsensical points and move on. I just wanted to see my team succeed and be happy because of that. 
 
However as time went by I could understand this need for a rivalry. The Flames have not been particularly relevant these last few years. I always thought I'd be happy they were not contesting with us at the highest of levels so that the fan-hate could die down. Alas that was not so, their team looks to be in an irreparable mess because the organization is too stubborn to start over, clinging onto the hope of making it to the playoffs each year with a mediocre, almost qualified team. As if their very jobs hung on the balance of merely making the playoffs when no person in their right mind would consider them to be cup contenders at all. In that case what is the point of making the playoffs only to be knocked out immediately? Is it not better to revamp that team to be highly competitive each and every year, fighting it out almost as if to the death with other teams so they could launch onto the podium and be the best? 
 
So now, watching games between the Canucks and Flames is just another game these days. No longer is it a game you'd be revved up about, excited to see your hated enemies fall under your triumphant...skates. Because besides getting those two points, there is no joy in seeing them lose. They have been down there for far too long and at this point you only want to see them succeed in some way so the passion and stakes during the games could one day be higher. It's funny because I have no hatred for the Oilers who if not this year already, at some point in the future will have highly contested games with us. We will not be dominant forever.
 
But again, not the point of this rant. I understand the need of a hated rivalry but I do not believe that the Canucks and Bruins are a rivalry at all. We ran into one another in the finals and many, many nasty plays occurred from both sides. I want to be able to explain why one of my beloved favourite players may have did what he did and instead of expressing blind hatred at certain players on their teams because of why they may have done what they did, try to understand as well. In the end the only explanation is raw, unadulterated emotion. We all do pretty dumb and stupid things when our logic is overcome with great emotion. The riot afterwards is a pretty good indication of that. I too, after that final game, was overcome with emotion and at first was glad of the riot. Our fans and even I at the time, felt so entitled for a Cup. I could still remember the chant during the post-games where fans would pump their fists up demanding for the Cup. Even if we were two games up on the other team, we were not guaranteed the Cup and it wasn't the fans ultimately that could've brought the Cup to the city, it was the players.
 
I still think to this day our fans could be far more considerate. My own parents dismiss the play of our players after a single bad game. The first game of the season for example they lambasted the play of both our goaltenders just because of the score at the end. It was a single game...the very first, after a long lockout. Even without those excuses goaltenders do have bad days just like any other normal person. To believe that a player no longer has it in them to be utterly perfect every single day a colossal failure is foolish. In fact when our team and many others were stripped of first-class plane privileges and filed a complaint, many fans acted as if they were rich millionaires who could not comprehend the real hardships of life. A sort of "first-world problems" kind of thing but even further!
 
Their opinions just felt so, so, entitled. Yes they are making a lot of money and we are not. It is the dream for many people to become star athletes raking in the cash. But their jobs are by no means easy no matter what kind of salary they are taking in. Our team has a rigorous travelling schedule just because of where our city is located in relation to the rest of the teams and sleep is incredibly important to your performance the next day. Suddenly their usual sleep arrangements are shrunk in half and their legs can barely stretch out. These players, keep in mind, are all in the range of six feet, so large space is necessary to be comfortable at all. So now their seats in the plane are no longer comfortable, their own rest impacted and tomorrow their game underwhelming. The media and fans, excepting the best of the best, begin criticizing them to no end, to demand that they are traded, to claim they are overpaid right after they implied that players have it so easy because of their big fat paychecks.
 
And players are not made of hardened stone who have the ability to completely ignore criticism. Some are better than others at this, but no one is perfect. The constant pestering of the media, the trade rumours, the player becoming a scapegoat all poking at the back of their minds. They attempt to do more than they are capable of and perhaps fuck up even more spectacularly. I would never be able to become a person in life who would be so focused by so many millions of the world and expected to perform day-in and day-out consistently so no one is let down. Truly these athletes and not just in sport, but in rigorous e-sports and other competitions such as chess and the like, have my complete respect for their ability to hold their own. To become as strong as they are to do the things they do because they truly love it...for me, the perfect job would be in my own home or perhaps an office where the only person expecting you to be efficient is your boss, not the eyes of millions.
 
Tolerance. To tolerate a single person who honestly should not rile you up about anything anyway, but you do, to tolerate the eyes of many who loudly judge you, to tolerate every singe annoyance in every aspect of life...and as you continue to build tolerance, the further you can proceed. Sometimes that brings me up to another aspect of life I've been looking into lately, the difference and wonders of extroversion and introversion.
 
The more I think about it...I don't think I'm an introvert. Not at all. Oh sure all those personality tests are pretty firmly confident that I'm a rather introverted person but well, the definition of introversion is a lot deeper than simply being reserved. You can speak the same of extroversion, to think of that word of simply Pinkie obnoxiously poking her head into everything for the purpose of fun would be wrong as well.
 
Sometimes I wonder...and this could be completely awful, but it's a legitimate thought I've had, if introversion even exists. Yes I have several, several introverted friends and they may even be appalled that I bring up such a point. I've seen images and comics and discussions and such of what introversion is. I can understand how it works. There are some people in the world who would rather read a book in their own time alone than to have five friends constantly pulling them towards the next big social event. Well that to me is not introversion but rather what type of entertainment we prefer. Being immersed in your mind as you dip into the imagination of story as opposed to being immersed in smelly, nosy people...oh, forgive my bias, in a drunk frat party filled with stupid people? Some actually prefer the former!
 
Well to actually be serious of this discussion...sometimes I wonder if introversion is simply a lack of built-up tolerance. You just cannot handle people because you simply do not like them sometimes, so you rather be in your room on your computer or reading a book. I've heard from various people, and forgive me for never remembering these sources, that seeing someone's face and being able to communicate via body language is healthy for the growth of a human. We have evolved always having communicated face-to-face and suddenly we are in the era of technology and of the internet and now, we do not have to go through the awkward and painful process of actual speech! We can type on a computer! Something you could've said without thinking could be retracted by the essence of a backspace before you hit send, and your words are suddenly wiser with mere clicks! Now the people on the internet seem far more smarter than those in real life because the words they say are so much more intelligent!!!
 
And now I realize...we're all pretty stupid people, but with a screen on our side, we have a buffer to keep us from throwing out those initial utterly moronic remarks we may have made face-to-face. Of course there are still plenty of people who choose not to use the buffer this way but of the opposite, so that they can make others angry in petty amusement. Had the internet not been invented what would we have been like then? We'd still be encouraged by media and people alike to be more outgoing and more social or else we wouldn't climb the ladder that is life. There was no room to escape into back then to run away from all the fears of society because we had to see to them face-to-face, every single time.
 
Sometimes I wonder.
 
I've always hated labels anyway. Am I extroverted? Introverted? Am I straight? Gay? Bi? Asexual? Am I religious? Atheist? Agnostic? Am I a brony? Pegasister? Feminist? Nerd? Hipster? Geek? Gamer? Artist? Writer? Potential terrorist? All these words always get thrown back and forth everywhere I see and I just...I'm not a person who chooses labels, one who can clearly define that YES, I AM THIS and nothing, nothing else because they have such rigid definitions and people do not have time to think of say, a hipster as anymore than thick rimmed glasses and scarves in the summer. People don't have TIME To think of these labels beyond that, they have lives to tend to but I also do not believe I am these things because you say so or I am these thinks because a dictionary says so. I don't really care if you call me one of these things because it'd be silly to be offended since, well, I do like ponies so it's only reasonable to call me a brony but I certainly won't ever introduce myself as "Spotto, the perhaps straight maybe gay possibly bisexual perhaps asexual temptingly religious probably agnostic understandably atheist likely a brony more likely a pegasister implied to be a feminist stereo-typically a nerd annoyingly a hipster ridiculously geeky somewhat a gamer sometimes an artist a soul of a writer and everyone's a potential terrorist! That'd be overwhelming and far too attention grabbing!
 
You know what? I'd rather just be plain ol' Spotto and you can make your presumptions from that. When you hang out with me or spend time with me, when we converse or chat...I am Spotto. Those labels are your shortcuts but don't expect me to use them as well because honestly I don't know. And frankly I do not care, I am not invested in each of those labels enough to really, really label myself in one anyway. I might like someone out there but to me, what gender they are or what skin colour they have or what build they are do not matter. And I'm not going to like someone else who looks similar to them because I probably like them for their personality and how they're pretty compatible with me, since I know them and we are friends. And that is not to say I do not yearn for intimate relationships because well, honestly I do. It is not a thing to be ashamed of and even if media is riddled by sex far too often I can find my way to whatever I want to watch and read all on my own.
 
But well...introversion? It probably exists and I am being silly, but I must admit my understanding of it isn't as great as people might believe. Frankly I don't get it. My favourite character is Pinkie Pie, guys. My least is probably Twilight, so this introversion thing is lost in my ears. However I will still give introverted people space because that's not a very friendly or nice thing to do to just demand attention from people. They are who they are and I am who I am. 
 
And since I just HAD to mention ponies...PONIES! Throughout this I also wondered why the flying fuck I loved Pinkie Pie so much. Because all the people I know or heard of who DO like Pinkie Pie are these crazy happy types themselves, and there I go using shortcuts myself. Or they like Pinkie because she is funny or something, but I don't really like Pinkie because she's humorous. I don't really like Pinkie because she's cute. Those aspects of her are certainly fine aspects to love about her, but not the big reason for me. And for some reason I feel others might possibly judge me for loving Pinkie Pie so much because it's kind of shallow. Because Pinkie Pie is so simple a character and a child could cling and be a favourite to. She isn't DEEP AND ARTISTIC like Rarity man! I'm after all some kind of (unfortunately) an art major, so why not identify with Rarity and what she goes through? I'm a reserved type of person who does not go outside and interact with people much, so why don't I identify with Twilight and her love of reading? Why not love Fluttershy the most because I actually DO identify with Fluttershy?
 
Then throughout all this tolerance and introversion crap...and wondering why I disliked Too Many Pinkie Pies so much when that episode is a fine episode for Pinkie's character did I realize the sole, precise one reason why I love Pinkie so bloody much. Because she makes me happy? I guess that's part of it.
 
But let us go back to my name. I am Spotto. 
 
Spotto derives from the dog character, Spot, of a picture book and Zotto, a character tic of some redhead from Final Fantasy VII that a friend liked using so often. Spotto-zotto. Dog? 
 
I love dogs so much. I've always been a dog person. For some reason introverts are cat people and extroverts are dog people. But for the longest time I considered myself an introvert, so why am I a dog person!? Or perhaps that saying is not absolute!? Did I like dogs because they were cute? Well cats are just as cute if not more! Dogs are my favourite animals...over tigers and majestic wolves and other cool animals. The dog. 
 
Man's best friend.
 
It goes all the way back to everything I've ever liked. I guess underneath Spotto I'm just...that little girl, long ago, who wishes for a true friend. A happy one who will cheer you up as you come in the door from a really bad day. I never grew out of this I guess. It's a pretty childish thing to cling onto, this wish for friendship and perhaps why I love ponies so much. It's a shame I can pinpoint this so easily for myself because at some point I thought I was some deep complicated person when it was all very, very simple. I'm not a picky person in terms of ACTUAL taste when it comes to media or anything really. For example the longest time I never wanted to watch TTGL not because I believed it was bad but the complete opposite. I have liked MANY things of QUESTIONABLE quality so if I let EVERY piece of media in my life, I'd get so immersed into it, it isn't even funny! It's a really stupid way of choosing favourites I know, but inside these questionable pieces of quality I watched or read of or whatever, the characters I'd pick out would be the same, simple little thing I've always wanted since as long as I could remember.
 
A friend. Kazumi and Sayo are not major characters and do not get character development! But damn if I am not a sucker for strong friendships. Usually the character who WOULD be the most amazing friend ever is my favourite and the character I identify with, the second favourite. That's why Murasa and Nue were no longer my favourite as sad as it was. Because Ten Desires came out and my incredible headcanon that Nue was this prideful but lonely loser disappeared when she actually had old other friends...and her so called "connection" with Murasa was so weak in canon it wasn't funny. ANYTHING that happened could have broken it easily. But this is why I ended up loving Keine and Mokou because they ARE STRONGLY canonly friends for some reason or another! I yearn to know why but it's heartwarming already that they are! Touhou is not a series in which you search for such things because everyone is a bloody jackass! Even in older series, Hetalia lasted so long because of my RP with a friend but deep in my head and thanks to other roleplays I read, Korea was my favourite and Hong Kong whom I identified with. (Kind of hard not to what with my chinese ethnicity) But his fanon characterization was so beautifully done, it was wondrous. 
 
But wait! Pinkie and Fluttershy? What the fuck? They don't interact very often and like, 90% of the fandom would agree that Pinkie would overwhelm the fuck out of Fluttershy anyway. It's happened several times in canon! How to explain!?!?
 
Well, we go back to the dog. Pinkie is, of all of these "amazing friend characters whom are my favouritest of favourites" the most dog-like. Seriously. She's still obviously a character and pony but she is just...her PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO MAKE OTHERS HAPPY! That's what a dog does! She eats so sloppily and neglect hits her HARD, like a dog! There are so many sad stories of people not paying attention to their pet dog but then when they pass on do they finally realize how much that dog, despite the lack of love they get, continue attempting to get you to approve of them and love them back! FRIEND IN DEED! Her motif is play! Pinkie Pie is the closest I will ever have to owning a dog. So why is Fluttershy there you ask!? Because why...why has Fluttershy never really shown to interact with many dogs? She is the ANIMAL pony is she not? I guess other animals need far more attention than dogs since dogs are understood by society already anyway, but if you think of Pinkie like this, and Fluttershy like that, it could work. Sometimes life isn't always concrete. Sometimes a pony, not necessarily Fluttershy, but like her, could use something like Pinkie, not necessarily Pinkie.
 
Oh how I yearn for Pinkie and Fluttershy friendshipping. It's why I'm so sad the show itself doesn't deal with duo-character episodes anymore. We could've not only had this, but other strange matchups that have lots of potential...like Pinkie and Rarity for hilarity. Or Fluttershy and Applejack with animals, or Rainbow Dash and Twilight because it's only been touched upon on the side with books and such...and maybe MORE of what we already seen! Rainbow Dash and Rarity? Rarity and Applejack? Rarity and ANYONE!? Where my Rarity episode at D:!? Countless countless matchups with infinite potential! My favourite fics are friendshipping and it's just...I miss season one man. Season 3 is great, but these types of episodes just don't happen anymore. It's always ONE character and CONFLICT or whatever. Friendships are ALWAYS evolving, just because two ponies have been friends forever does not mean there isn't some story you can string around it.
 
Of course this rant ended in ponies. Thank you for reading and this has been Spotto!
spotto: (koi)
Hello Dreamwidth, it's been a while.
 
And frankly, I am sad that it has been. I know exactly why I haven't been typing up stuff here lately. It is not because no one reads this because even if no one does (I know people do) that isn't the point of writing posts up here. I realize now why I haven't. In order to produce walls of text you need to actually have walls of text you want to write out. I did not. And I know why.
 
Lately, I have not been thinking. These past few months have not been all that productive really. And by "productive" I mean actually doing something and not being a mindless drone in front of the computer screen. I've actually felt closer to the real world over the internet yet I still spend a large amount of time here. 
 
Playing video games and going on Tumblr or Reddit isn't productive to me. These things do not allow me to think, just do. Whenever I am on Tumblr I mention a couple of things people actually don't care about as I have no followers who give a damn about anything I post and whenever I do post things there they largely feel pointless anyway. Tumblr drains my thought away. So often an article of interest pops up and I check the notes to see if any discussion popped up about it, but then all I see are thousands of reblogs with not a single person saying a thing. Tumblr isn't about discussion, I get it. It's about reblogging or liking things that you see on your dashboard that was interesting, but nothing more.
 
And that is not productive.
 
Reddit is a bit better about it I suppose. It feels like a more community-oriented Tumblr. The front page or the subreddits you've subscribed to are again, points of interest that pop up you can look at. This time they are accompanied by discussion, and that's great.
 
Unfortunately, thanks to the very efficient upvoting system...you have little opportunity to actually think. By the time you look at something, there's already 300 comments and the top voted comment is already everything you wanted to say. The response is everything they left out and mentioned. No need to think here, everyone thinks for you. And that is fine but it leaves you not really developing your own opinion, just agreeing with others and never exercising your brain on how it should or should not be. The purpose of this blog is to throw my own opinions on it, so I can figure things out on my own. I enjoy that.
 
The lack of all that has left me feeling like mush. Like I'm just sitting here, a waste of a human brain. Having a job you hate is not using your brain. Going to school for a specific subject too, is not using your brain, at least not way I want to use my brain. With the specific subject you're ultimately limiting yourself to one thought, and not being able to process everything you see in the world. If only there was a job for that. I suppose there used to be, a long time ago...all those "great thinkers" and the like who were heralded and such, although a majority of them were probably spewing blasphemy at the time and the population ousted them as crazy or outrageous. 
 
I've been playing World of Tanks and it strengthens your technical skill. However that game is possibly the most mindnumbing game in existence. You are thrown with not just one other or four other teammates like other games might be, but fourteen others. These strangers will change every game, every six or seven minutes as will your opponent. Playing public games constantly is never going to be consistent considering how random every match will end up being. I do not see myself improving just by playing these pub games over and over again. Not only that, but as you go up the tech tree you will likely switch tanks and ultimately switch playstyles. I played the T-34, a medium that had high RoF and low armour. I basically sped around going pew-pew-pew...its upgrade, the T-34-85, did not improve on the armour at all except the turret and it gets a massive gun instead with low RoF. You can't play it like a T-34, you have to drop everything you've learned on the T-34 and learn how to play a sniper. By the time you've learned how to play a sniper you can get the KV-13...which has a crappy gun, high frontal armour and is meant to brawl and flank. So now you have to forget about your sniper ways and try to adapt to this NEW playstyle, while playing in public games over and over again in unpredictable matches and unpredictable opponents and teammates.
 
The nature of this game however, is that I could improve by playing tank companies or creating a clan. Both options require real money. I can't even play with more than one other person without paying. (I could join a random tank company for free, but that would only be somewhat more consistent than pub matches) or joining a clan. There are clans that train you and such, and clanwars are filled with tactical advantages to improve you greatly. I just don't want to do either of these without Ed, but I don't think he's willing to do either so I'll either keep mind-numbingly playing pub matches hoping I improve while reading some tutorials online or something, or no longer enjoy it and have my brain become mush.
 
And you're probably wondering why I came here to discuss, why I am suddenly thinking now, which is great. Thinking allows me to daydream, something I've been doing so less of. Daydreaming seems useless to most people, but I think the contrary. Making up stories within your mind is highly enjoyable, like a movie you created all yourself just for you! And again, it means you use your brain rather than conforming with everyone else. Posting a random short message on Twitter or updating your status on Facebook does nothing. Upvoting a post and mentally agreeing does nothing. I rather disagree. I rather disagree and start typing up paragraph after paragraph of why I do. It allows you to use your brain in any way you wish to. That is why I'm disappointed in the outlook of the next generation. A few years back everyone had a blog where they can write what the hell they wanted even if no one gave a fuck about what they thought. Now, most people abandon these blogs and just flock to the Twitters and Facebooks and Tumblrs and Reddits. Where they no longer need to type gigantic paragraphs, but become lazy and let their brains melt into that goo. Why is it becoming socially acceptable to be too lazy to express your complete thoughts? Why do people require short little comics to express their views, or something witty and clever that though makes us chuckle, can't possibly envelop the entire thought? These shortened messages encourage misunderstandings. 
 
But I'm not asking for an answer, I already know. People do this because they have no time. The less time they have, the less time they can be engaged, and the less time they can be engaged, the shorter their attention spans become. It feeds itself into a downward spiral where their brains will ultimately adapt to a lifestyle filled with routine after routine, never thinking for themselves. Then the media of the world can take advantage of it, we just jump to one side without ever giving thought as to why we do. We then vote for some moron to lead our country and then the world continues on its own downward spiral into hell; the exact world I am witnessing.
 
Okay perhaps that is a stretch, but you know what I mean. P:
 
And to the actual reason as to why I am thinking, I read a scanlated fan light novel of Touhou the other day. It was two hundred pages. 
 
I know why people love to read. I know why reading is good for you because it allows you to think. Perhaps all those English classes where we analyzed the books we read were actually a useful experience. (Speaking of English, "an useful" sounds odd) Unfortunately I was never interested in those books or books at all. I was never a reading person, but somehow I still ended up enjoying writing and wanting to express my thoughts. I'm not sure how that came to be. The English subject is such an importance in schools. It's not just there to make sure you type in correct grammar and spelling (which, if the many teenagers typing on the internet count, doesn't seem to be happening anyway). (And I still dunno where to place the damn period whenever there's a sentence in parentheses at the end of one) But the purpose is to make a person think. So when they see a supposed "fact" they will question it, to make sure what they are told is really true, just like how Math ultimately teaches logic. 
 
Also I hate this entire rant. The points are there, but I haven't typed such long paragraphs in so long my English is downright abysmal. I'm not using any advanced vocabulary and there are simple sentences and awkward ones all over the place, so I apologize. @_@ It's hard to type atm, but at least my thoughts are written down.
 
Anyway the light novel was actually quite confusing. I understood the gist of the plot, but because it was a translation from a work written in Japanese, not every sentence could be translated completely loyally, and that led to some awkward paragraphs. It also didn't help that Touhou characters, at least when portrayed close to canon, act incredibly cryptically and mysteriously. All those damn Yuyukos and Yukaris and Kanakos never telling you what the hell is going on, just dropping hints or being all ~MYSTERIOUS~ just makes everything even more confusing. Despite that, I quite enjoyed the story. The novel lacked every single one of my favourite characters as well. I feel like Youmu who is never told anything despite owning a sword that can supposedly cut confusion.
 
Okay that was a lie. It had Renko, who was pretty much the protagonist...I think. And she's one of my favourites! Like, number 18 or something! Yes.
 
This post will obviously spoil everything. I found the ending to one that could be subjected to great speculation. The story is basically Renko and Mary finding the crack into Gensokyo, except to Mary there seems to be way too many cracks than normal. Only Renko actually ends up in Gensokyo, and she is almost moiderized by Rumia when Marisa saves her. Marisa was just with Reimu trying to figure out why Gensokyo was going out of whack. (all the seasons were happening at once for example) Whenever an incident happens Reimu, being the shrine maiden, acts, but she is not. This means whatever is happening cannot be prevented and we learn why. Gensokyo is ending. There is a lot of philosophy in this story. What begins must end. Yukari loves Gensokyo and though knows the end of Gensokyo cannot be prevented, she tries to stop it anyway. That's how much she loves it.
 
We soon learn the story goes with the popular theory where Mary IS Yukari, and in fact, the whole of Gensokyo is revealed to actually be someone's dream. All dreams must end at some point. The residents of Gensokyo after some large amount of drama eventually decide they will do whatever they want, whether it be to attempt to stop the dream from ending or just having a huge party to end it all out, they go do whatever they want. The twist is that the world outside of Gensokyo is also a dream, and Renko's entire life was but a dream. She has been asleep for a long time, and her bestest best friend, Mary, entered the dream she had to try to prevent Renko from dying, but by doing so and trying to maintain the dream as Yukari, ended up destroying herself. So Mary ends up killing herself to save Renko, and as the dream ends and Gensokyo crumbles, Renko wakes up. 
 
Which is all terribly depressing until Renko is like "FUCK THAT!" runs up the mountain where they entered Gensokyo in the dream, finds the abandoned Hakurei Shrine, finds a box with the shrine maiden outfit in it and apparently becomes the shrine maiden and starts Gensokyo!?!?
 
Like I said, the ending is very speculative. For one thing, Mary herself might only exist in the dream. In that case, Renko may have forgotten (or not cared) about her real life and just went insane trying to stay attached to the dream. (Of course a lot of people prefer the interpretation that Renko refuses to take what the world gives her and does what she wants, which is the ultimate message of the story) But this ending leads to another question we ask about not just the story, but Touhou itself.
 
There are a lot of discussions in storytelling itself, especially for example, to Disney.
 
WHERE ARE THE PARENTS!?
 
And we are told. They are dead, missing, abandoned or whatever.
 
However in Touhou with very few exceptions there are ZERO parents. The only existence of family is a few siblings here and there. We are also never told where the hell they are.
 
And I am actually okay with that.
 
Okay, I'll explain here. A majority of the characters in Touhou are youkai. Youkai are crazy long-living and have various origins. So obviously it would be an abnormality if they DID have existing family members still alive. The few humans though, are the ones we must question. Youmu for example is half-ghost, which leads to many Touhou fans asking "HOW DOES THAT EVEN!?" And she has a grandfather who disappeared, who served Yuyuko before Youmu. That of course leads to many other questions, like who the hell her parents were if she has a grandfather and why they are they never even mentioned. Of course since we don't even know how half-ghosts can possibly exist, we'll just move onto some other humans.
 
What we do know about Reimu is she is a shrine maiden and is the latest in the line of shrine maidens for the Hakurei Shrine. That means her predecessor, likely a parent did exist and function for Gensokyo at some point, and since Reimu's job is to be the shrine maiden now, her parent isn't necessary anymore. We can safely assume they either died or retired and left, not wanting to hang around the shrine anymore for whatever reason. In certain fanworks a "Hakurei Miko", Reimu's fan-mom sometimes shows up to make sure Reimu isn't being stupid. She tends to show up in the more outrageous works.
 
Marisa's father is mentioned in the story...somewhere. Granted I don't look into the official manga as much as I should. (For some reason I can read a 200 page fan light novel but only stare at some of the manga, I dunno why) Apparently her father left, abandoned her or whatever. He does not have a name, only known by "Mr. Kirisame". But we DO at least know where one of Marisa's parents went.
 
However the most mysterious of them all is probably Sanae. Well Sakuya's probably even more mysterious but because she's possibly not even human kind of rules her out. Sanae used to live in the real world. In the real world, you kind of require some parents to care for you as children. There aren't obvious signs of supernatural beings who could do whatever the hell they want, even as young'uns. But somehow Sanae was able to come into Gensokyo as either a teenager or late teenager (perhaps even adult) with no intention of returning to her more mundane life. She came with her goddesses, acting as their wind priestess. If she lived in the real world, she'd have gone to school and therefore required a parent or someone to guard over her. Some people could say maybe the goddesses were her guardians, but because they were losing so much faith no one could even see them besides Sanae, thus why they moved, so that cannot possibly be. Perhaps, just like Reimu, Sanae's predecessor as the wind priestess was her parent? And they were done or died or whatever? And they agreed for the sake of their god's survival that she and her goddesses should move to Gensokyo? I suppose that might make the most sense, but there is absolutely nothing there to suggest such or not, so we can only speculate.
 
But because Touhou is such where family is not an element in its universe and story, where a majority of characters are youkai so we do not expect family, we don't really even expect the humans to have any either. Besides, the real families are all the characters that do live with one another. Scarlet Devil Mansion, Hakugyokurou, Mayohiga, Eientei, Moriya Shrine, Chireiden, Myouren Temple... I don't think the TD characters live with each other. >: And they, throughout their story and through various fanworks, demonstrate their love of each other and their willingness to work together, that the family does not need to be blood-related to be family. Good enough for me!
 
But...it is not good enough in the context of this light novel. Renko and Maribel live in the "real" world, which in this story was also part of the dream. However, when Renko wakes up, she is in a hospital room. No one else is there, no family, no nurses or doctors. She decides to run off to a mountain and make her dream a reality (making dreams reality is another message, basically "Do what you want" and "Dreams" were the message) And we can only presume since we have no other information provided, that she wakes up in...our world, I guess. The REAL real world. Because the dream real world is a place where children do not smile and all discoveries of physics already happened, according to the mangas and music CD stories by ZUN. So we can assume that Renko probably had a family of some sort, and that doctors and nurses probably existed in a hospital. They probably went "WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR COMA PATIENT!?" and can never find Renko because she went to some obscure deserted location. (My suspension of disbelief still works because this entire story and Touhou itself lacks all common sense anyway)
 
So the doctors will be confused and any family she might have will wonder and worry like hell. Not only that, if Mary DID exist in the real real world, then her OWN family will wonder why THEIR DAUGHTER FELL ASLEEP AND NEVER WOKE UP. And because Renko ran away to make her dream a reality, BOTH FAMILIES LOST THEIR DAUGHTERS.
 
So I think, in that context, the ending (after the whole Renko crying, because this ending happened after the credits and such, like a stinger...perhaps it is not canon in terms of the story?) isn't very good, but we don't know for sure. Even what ending happened is difficult to determine, we can only speculate. And maybe the both of them, or just Renko's if Mary never actually existed, families are all dead. And the only ones confused will be the doctors, as their little coma patient was spirited away...twice. Mayhaps Renko is actually ZUN! And the Touhou games are his efforts to make his dream a REALITY!? OO: !?!? O:!? I:!? ?
 
...speaking of dead or disappeared families or loved ones, I watched the Dark Knight Rises the other day. Most people are raving about it and sending death threats to people who criticize it, which is all old news but I thought to mention. I will also be one of those contraries...I only thought the movie was okay and I'm not entirely sure why. I found Batman Begins and The Dark Knight quite amazing, so how come this last one didn't do it for me? Again, I can only speculate.
 
The movie itself was quite long, there were lines from Bane I couldn't make out. Granted, there are lines from ME I can't make out when I hear myself because I have a thick accent and a stupid voice. The thing is, in Batman Begins...we watched it for Batman. It was the first movie of a brand new Batman remake, we of course watch it for Batman and see what this new director does with his character. We liked Batman in this movie.
 
In the Dark Knight, it is not Batman we care about as much so more (and people already hate his fake gruffy voice, so) but the Joker. The Joker was what made this movie, he was the focal point this time and he was so brilliant the movie is considered by many the best of all time. No wonder there are aggressive fanboys. They want this image they saw of the movie to be untouched that perhaps, some people when they watched the final movie made it seem better than it is? I don't want to make myself sound like my opinion is more valid than theirs or anything like that, especially since I'm not a fan of the comic books or anything. (Comic Book fan or not, the movie has nothing to do with them, it's just the director's story using the characters of Batman so whether or not we've read any of the Batman comic books or watched other movies or animations we'd still understand)
 
It's just that, after all those movies of the week I've been viewing. I've seen a good share of movies now and I actually don't like a lot of them. And a few days before I saw the Dark Knight Rises, I watched "Leafie, a Hen into the Wild" which I thought was a grand masterpiece. So perhaps those factors changed my views, perceptions and expectations of movies, especially one like Dark Knight Rises. 
 
But for actual flaws of TDKR, I'll have to paraphrase what some other critics have said. The movie ultimately feels like it doesn't have a focal point. It isn't all BATMAN like Batman Begins or all JOKER like The Dark Knight. You introduce several important characters like Catwoman and Bane, but because the movie is the finale, it's GOT to focus on Batman himself. We need to resolve his story after all! But maybe there wasn't enough time for the story Nolan wanted to tell. I did not care when Bruce Wayne found a way out of the pit. It didn't feel like it was that much of a feat. The movie did not focus on him enough for me to care. And since TDKR felt more like a sequel to Batman Begins than The Dark Knight, I had to look deep into my memory on what the hell happened in Batman Begins because that was a long fucking time ago. 
 
Yeah, I didn't see the twist coming like so many of the comic book fans did. But the ending was...people all called this movie super dark, but that ending isn't dark. If Batman died, that would be dark. It felt like a Disney ending. Of course he probably DESERVED that ending, but if people are going to call the movie dark the entire movie should be dark. @_@ That's not really a criticism of the movie itself, just to people saying IT WAS REALLY DARK OMG. That pit is totally dark what with everyone encouraging you to rise, Batman! I found The Dark Knight to be far darker. 
 
And if a movie has Morgan Freeman it should have more Morgan Freeman than that! 
 
But I don't hate the movie. It wasn't bad, but for a finale of a trilogy with such insane hype, it's impossible to fulfill those high expectations. Even so apparently a majority enjoyed it, so good enough for them.
 
I'm also curious of what Robin fans think of Robin (like Akira) because rather than being a canon Robin he's like...all the Robins combined, with the real name of Robin. But then he becomes Batman. I think that's acceptable because people switch superhero identities all the time in those silly comics, but I'm just wondering.
 
There is also apparently a huge controversy over the call that led to the penalty kick in the Canada - USA semifinals. The penalty kick led to USA tying the game and ultimately winning in the last few seconds of extra time's extra time. I don't know enough about soccer to form an opinion about this incident itself, but I do hate the fact that you can get suspended for criticizing the referees, which a few Canadian players (including our best, Sinclair) did. So many times in hockey I've seen people complain about the referees and when you watch, sometimes it is blatant enough that complaints should be justified. And frankly, shouldn't criticism be accepted so referees can be improved? Granted oftentimes the complaints aren't exactly CONSTRUCTIVE criticism but silencing all those who complain without giving a single explanation as to why what happened happened feels like corruption. It really does! It's like if a corrupted government starts seeing someone rebel because what they were told was wrong, so in response they shoot them. I hate that people can be suspended by such comments, or fined heavily. The Burrows incident with the Auger referee for example. Isn't it mighty suspicious a referee pulled player to the side pre-game? Why not investigate? Why would a referee ever do that, and why don't they ever take the word of the player? Sure, Burrows does not have the greatest of reputations, but why the hell would he lie? What would he gain from making his up? Nothing!
 
In the wise wise words of Malcolm in the Middle, "Life is unfair."
 
So yeah...I wonder if this wall-of-text made up for the inactivity here lately? I sure did have many thoughts this morning. TO LUNCH! And to recharge. This is Spotto, signing off.
spotto: (35)
 A few weeks back (or a month? eh) we were eliminated in five games by the Los Angeles Kings.

Yeah, the guy in my avatar came in after two games of our number one letting in a few bad goals.

Or at least, that is what you would ASSUME. In reality the entire team was just doing awful and Luongo did his best to hold the fort. The reason to switch up the goaltenders was not due to his poor play, but to shake things up. Wake up the team, make them change their habits lest end up letting the other team light-up our other goaltender too! I was quite happy and overjoyed when we won the fourth game. I kept telling myself though, not to be too happy since we're still in our deep, deep hole. We've just avoided being buried for a while, so we can climb out. Sadly we couldn't go it in game five, to lose in overtime...somewhat heartbreaking.

But I found it pointless to rant about it in this blog after that happened because it already happened. I read through many opinions of fans, non-fans and the like. While I was a bit down for a few days, I soon got over it. Just a few hours back the Los Angeles Kings swept the St. Louis Blues. A few years ago I'd be upset because I was one of those immature folk who go around spiting teams that have beaten us, trying to feel better about our loss. But unlike a team like Chicago or Boston, I felt no ill-will to the Kings. Oh sure, there were some questionable plays and some fans thought they were dirty, but I think every team's fans feel that way about the opposing team. In the playoffs, our bias grow into substantial heights and we want to glorify every single thing our hometown team does while painting the opposition so badly it's almost like they were sent by the devil. 

However I truly feel no ill-will of the Los Angeles Kings. My only beef might be that they're rivals to the San Jose Sharks, a friend of mine's favourite team. I like rooting for friend's teams as well. But SJS is out too and I truly believe these Kings are the real deal. I think the reason we lost were due to a whole lot of dumb mistakes, and if we had our act together the series would've instead went to seven games. But note that, I didn't say we'd easily win if we minimized our mistakes. I already knew from the get-go the Kings would be tough and the series would be tight. We'd have to come with our best if want to beat them, but we simply didn't show up. They easily too advantage and everyone from their team elevated their play, so we lost.

A first round exit, definitely not the expectations of such demanding fans here in Vancouver. Nonetheless I'm not even that surprised. Ever since we canned Nonis all those years back, I had always said that the coach should have been fired too. I still believe that, and I'm willing to bet we won't have much success the longer we keep this coach. His decisions don't really impress me at all, and we lost to Chicago those two times due to ultimately being out-coached I think. I feel our team is spectacular, the best we've had in franchise history but the potential and talent we have is being wasted because our management, especially the coaching, isn't up-to-the-task. Maybe I'm overestimating my own team? Maybe the coach really has brought them to the best of their ability and this is what's to show? In the majority of the latter half of the season, we barely squeaked by many wins with little effort. Our star players went on the worst slump since their rookie years and we made a rather demoralizing trade, in my opinion, during the Trade Deadline. Our coach is there to pump up the team right? I know many people argue it isn't completely the coaches' job to make sure the players are motivated, but look at LA, the team that beat us!

Their year was far from perfect, in fact mediocre. Many people thought they would be excellent this year because their team, at least on paper, had a whole assortment of excellent players...yet for some strange reason they underachieved! It was a new coaching change that began a wave of good things like more scoring and better all-around play! The reason many people cite for their less-than-stellar season? The team not being motivated, and a coach came in and did that...now they're tearing through the playoffs despite being an eighth seed. So if their team can be demotivated despite having a great players, and are now finding tons of success...isn't that the same for us? The excuse I kept hearing during the season of our lazy play was that due to our position in the standings the games had little meaning, we were already guaranteed a spot in the playoffs. Our reason for not playing well in the season was how much we looked forward to the playoffs, and yet we lost in the first-round. 

Anyway I am not going to throw my opinion into what goaltender we should keep, why Kesler underachieved, why anything at all happened. For now I will simply accept whatever comes our way because it is out of my hands. I certainly didn't want Hodgson traded, but now the GM comes out and pretty much states that he was a problem player, and that he implied the guy didn't want to be here. Yet Hodgson seemed so classy, so accepting of his role during his speeches and interviews. Whatever his true feelings on the matter are, I wouldn't know. 

It's funny, in the beginning of the season both I and my friend, Doughboy, who is the Sharks fan, agreed that this season was not going to be as exciting as the last because we both thought our team this year wasn't as good as last year. Then both the Canucks and Sharks lose in the first round, it's as if we already knew this would happen. Either way, what's done is done. Everyone will be a year older and the cup window will be closed soon, so if not next year maybe not for a while? Who knows. 

What I do know is that, rather than feeling spite or disdain for the Kings and their fans...I feel happy for them. They too have yet to win a Cup, and they have rarely reached the Conference Finals (this is their second time in franchise history) even if LA is a rich city with lots of other sports franchises that are probably more successful, I still want their hockey fans to feel the same way we did last year. The exciting rush pass all the teams we played into the Cup Final, and I sincerely hope they do not experience the heartbreak we did on that Game 7, losing to the Boston Bruins. Their coach has the credentials to win after all. He coached an overachieving Flames team from a single win to the cup after all. Maybe this year some spectacular history can be made, since an eighth seed has yet to win the Cup. Sure they already made history through other records, but I'm sure on those player's minds they only care for that Cup.

And no, I'm not glorifying their team either. Certain players I may not like on that team, but to wish for the entire team to fail just because you dislike one-or-two is rather unfair to the rest of the players, does it not? Well as a hockey-fan I've a lot to learn about cheering for my own team. Perhaps I'm not a very good Canucks fan if I don't hate the Kings. Even though I dislike the Blackhawks a lot of the players on their team isn't so bad. The Bruins may have many players I don't like either, but that doesn't mean the entire team is stupid or something. Success is success, whether you like the team obtaining it or not. So I'll be satisfied no matter who wins the cup, but the dream of watching the blue, green, and white jersey lifting up the hardest trophy in sports one day won't die. I'm sure those fans who've been following the Canucks for their entire existence know much better than I do, so even if it's been seven long years of being a fan, here is to the eighth and hopefully lucky year. No matter who is on our roster, even if I have to begrudgingly tolerate our coach....I'll be a fan.

But for this playoffs at least? I do believe I am rooting for the Kings. (I was also rooting for Nashville but they're kind of in a deep hole like we were at the moment :C I'm rooting for the Caps in the East, only them. If they don't win it's West all the way!)

So uh, Go Kings Go?

:C

Feb. 28th, 2012 05:27 am
spotto: (35)
Every Trade Deadline I hardly follow, nothing too major happens anyways. Last time something significant occurred in my eyes was way back when we traded Matt Cooke. Sure he was only a third-liner but he'd been a Canuck his whole career before he was traded, so it was major enough in my eyes.

Certainly did not expect something like this.


You'd think, being first in the West, no, first overall, we wouldn't be doing much, NEED to do much during the deadline...and yet we made the biggest splash. And it wasn't for a rental either! It was a trade that could've happened at any point during the season, most likely during the off-season yet we decided to do it now. I strongly believe the purpose and the only reason the Trade Deadline should be a prime time for trading itself is for poor teams to trade off rentals for picks in the future, or perhaps struggling players traded for others that require a change of scenery to fix up their careers, but certainly not this. Even if it was a team that required defense and therefore traded an unneeded center to a team lacking in depth in the middle for a defensemen would've made sense, but this was NOTHING of the sort!

I remember the comments the TSN analyst had very well when we drafted Cody Hodgson. He was a steal. He was a perfect pick because Linden had just retired. It wasn't just for his skills, the fact that he led Team Canada in points during the World Juniors! He was a smart hockey player, compared to Stamkos without the exploding speed. He was intelligent, could make the players around him better and he was a classy, classy player. He shined with charisma and leadership in his interviews and despite the rough patches he went through due to injuries and the media hounding him so much about it, he endured it through. Many people have said that he would be our future captain...he has character. But he is no longer on the Canucks, the Canucks who I think need this player a lot more than most people believe. This year our top two lines are scoring less...and we've had so many one-goal games this year. Think of all the times in the last month or so when we went to overtime or the shootout...so often, and Hodgson was the one who provided so much of that depth scoring required to go above that hurdle. If it were last year and Hodgson was in this same situation with the same amount of points, then I would have minded less because we were so dominant last year. We blew games open, we very much had offense. This year? I think its our defense and goaltenders bailing us out more often than usual...and that means offensive prowess is down.

Oh but we have too many centers you say. Henrik and Kesler are above him in the depth chart, he'd never have opportunity to succeed here.

Good god man, Henrik and Kesler are only two people. If there were more centers, yes he'd have nowhere to go, but third-line center is an ideal place to develop a young player slowly, not to throw him against the dogs that is the more offensive forwards of the opposition and their high-caliber shut-down defensemen. Remember the playoffs? Kesler carried the entire team pass Nashville but disappeared afterwards due to injury, still played but wasn't the same. He couldn't even start this season in time due to surgery...it happened the year before as well! We always have some injury to some player somewhere, and our offense is down...that's why we need insurance like Hodgson. Not only that, but we always have this silly philosophy that we can't have too many defensemen...well we can't have too many centers either. They have a lot of responsibility in their position, and should either of our top two drop out...I fear for our chances for the cup.

It's not like we obtained Hodgson recently. We picked him in 2008, were so patient with him through the years...cheered for him in the World Juniors, watched him play in the Moose...followed him through his back problems, cheered for him to make the team every year out of camp. He finally gets to play on the team but is regulated to fourth-line minutes. I remember his first goal, cheered so hard for a young kid like him. It felt nice to have such a stellar rookie inside a deep team, when was the last time we had such an awesome rookie? We've had players developed into franchise players, but during their first years they merely had marginal points and minutes, and we weren't super excited like we were for Hodgson...their development, like Kesler or Burrows...were all a surprise. Even the Sedins, thought to only ever been second-line players, surprised us, but we never seemed all that excited about them in their first years. 

And it isn't even the off-season...this is his first full year. He took so long to make the lineup and gain a respectable permanent spot on the roster, getting to know our players and learning his game only to suddenly and shockingly be traded in the middle of the season. Being first in the league, no doubt he was excited about having a large role in our playoffs, potentially returning to the finals just like last year with the teammates he's meshed well with lovely chemistry for many months...it feels so cruel to ship him off to a team in the East, a team not nearly as good and not even in a playoff spot. Sure he'll get more minutes, but there goes everything he's done here besides the points he's picked up, no wonder he sounded so heartbroken when he heard the news. (From a teammate no less, our GM couldn't even be bothered to tell him first)

Maybe I'd be less bothered if we actually landed someone who would help us right away. Yes we landed Zack Kassian, I actually like him, and while he may be younger...that's the problem, he's younger. He isn't going to step into our lineup and make an impact when he wasn't even on the main Buffalo roster in the East. Also he's nothing like Hodgson, which I suppose is the point, but when I say nothing I mean nothing. He wasn't on the team in Buffalo probably due to his lack of confidence crippling his play, and his frustrations with the team itself. He's a big guy who can hit and fight, a power forward with a lot of punch, but there goes that respectable aura of hockey sense we had in #9...and will he make the players around him better? Can he playmake as well or is he another shooter? The last thing we need are shooters, just look at our second line. I also thought we had powerforwards in Higgins, Kesler, and Booth...sure not necessarily pure powerfowards, but I really doubt the Canucks probably at the moment requires grit and toughness. I am extremely disappointed in our GM in reasoning that this trade was meant to improve grit and toughness, which is a mindset I am completely against.

We did not lose to Boston because we were soft. We had a long, tough playoff run to get there, and by that point Kesler was injured and probably one of the Sedins. As a result we could not score on their goaltender who was lights out. Oh, perhaps toughness would keep our players from being injured earlier in the playoffs you say? Yes, because being knocked out by a massive hit and having some tough guy come in and respond is going to magically heal our injured player. It's not going to stop others from hitting or fighting, and frankly fighting was always something I saw very rarely in the playoffs...the playoffs is about skill, not bullying others around until they succumb to your immature antics after you've made sure the referees weren't looking! I do not want our team to stoop to that level...we were trying to be like Detroit remember? The team with many cups obtained through sheer skill and character? Not Boston, who bullied their way to the cup? (Though with excellent goaltending)

If we needed grit and toughness, land a fourth-liner like Parros or something, obtain Ott...without giving up such a valuable asset. We have picks do not we not? Did no other team really not want Raymond? It's not like either of these players are ridiculously expensive like Nash...we didn't have to minus such a large part of our depth scoring for someone who may take a while before he starts clicking with the others, scoring and the like.

I am just highly disappointed at this turn of events...while I will still watch the games obviously, I sadly do not see another prospect like Hodgson entering our franchise anytime soon. It's not like he was playing bad, he was playing amazingly...and if this trade has anything to do with the coach...welp, that'll be a big addition to my reasons of disliking the coach. I've wanted him fired when we got rid of Nonis, wondering why in bloody hell we kept the coach...we obviously can't fire him now, not with the team doing so well...but I mean, we obviously don't need to trade such big pieces of our team...what with the team doing so well...or so I thought. His tendencies to pick favourites and not give certain players a chance will always annoy me, and he was outcoached each time we lost to Chicago...

This isn't some disappointment that will fade as time goes by, it's not an immediate thing. You see a player get picked, you follow his status for many years, he is finally succeeded at the level he wants to be and this happens...it feels very disheartening at the very least. I will see the team from this day forth with a big hole down that center, no longer will we have three lines of scoring...sure we got that center from Columbus, but he isn't a scorer...he's just a guy to help shutdown the other team. Perhaps with more defensive people like him we wouldn't need as much scoring? I don't know. I really, really don't know. I have confidence in this team to go deep into the playoffs and perhaps even bring home that elusive cup, but today I feel the chances have diminished.

I wonder where my hat went. Every player who's signed it is no longer on the team...my cursed, cursed hat, including the autographs of Bernier, Ehrhoff, and Hodgson...
spotto: (FLUTTERSHY)
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Nice to know I can sit back and have a pitcher with the best ponies.

A week or so ago I heard that not only were the Sedin twins picked to go to the All Stars game (obv.) but Edler was invited this year as well! It made me actually excited for this year's All Star's for once, but he didn't get to do anything during the show. I was very much anticipating Edler showing off his hard shot, which is easily over 100 mph, but no. All he got to do was pass for one of the events (and no it wasn't the passing event) so yeah... :\ Not to mention being the last defensemen picked, but eh...he's always been underrated.

So once again having even a small amount of excitement for a completely pointless event was unnecessary! :X

In other news I made a website. No it's not one of those "Spotto felt like web designing randomly again", I just thought to gather up everything of my clan into one place. Here it is. Besides if I feel like web designing again it'd likely be an actual layout for this blog, lol.

Finally...my thoughts on the latest pony! The Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000!

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This was the episode. You can go home now.

If you want the abridged version, I thought it was okay.

The episode was well-received by many pony fans and I suppose it has to do with the new villains who reminded many of that swindler from the Simpsons promoting his MONORAIL. I don't know why I didn't like it as much as I thought I would. I guess it has to do with many factors, including but probably not limited to my incredibly high praise of The Last Roundup (hard to match that awesomeness) or that I actually didn't like the villains themselves. I found it very jarring that they had different pony anatomy to the whole town. Everyone else had the same body type and these guys were much taller and ganglier, which also made their song-dance number all the more off-putting. I didn't find the song all that catchy by the way unlike many others besides the "cider" chanting part from the audience. I even tried to watch the original where the song was heavily inspired from and didn't find it all that catchy either, maybe this type of song isn't my thing? Near the end of the song I was mostly muttering to myself "Wow, this song is REALLY long..." ...and why do one-off villains I don't give jack-all about get such a freakin' long song before AJ even gets one for herself!? I thought since they were singing AJ might get a rebuttal song later on, but their song went on for WAY too long so it was impossible for AJ to get a song later else have little of anything in the episode itself. Blah.

Rainbow Dash not being able to get a drop of cider was rather amusing though and I loved the intro of the episode. Seeing Fluttershy's cottage again is very welcome, but the episode isn't about her. (She's been put with Rainbow Dash A LOT this season...this is just a really silly theory, but I think the writers are putting these two together for a purpose, like they don't know how to write them as well as last season so try to play them off one another. It would explain Rainbow's slightly exaggerated personality this season and Fluttershy's MIA-ness. I've only seen them play off one another for on-screen gags, similar to Pinkie before she got her Baby Cakes episode and brilliant Last Roundup showing)

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Their faces are so weird from this angle. :\

Applejack was pretty awesome this episode. I did love her letter to Celestia, very much surprised me. I didn't think she could be so smug, so it gave her a little bit of jump in character :D. I think I've had an Apple Family overdose this month though. They've been everywhere this season and I don't know why. I can't say it's a bad thing necessarily, but I wonder why they decided to give them so much more screentime over other minor characters. I mean yeah, Spike got his own episode but he's been missing in a few episodes this season and is hardly ever a supporting cast member in the vein of the Mane Six, so I'd see him getting more episodes than the Apple Family. Plus it'd give Twilight more screentime after losing her letter to Celestia excuse to appear in every episode last season. I also want to see more of AJ WITHOUT her family, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen very often this season. Plus with the Apple Family being so prominent, Apple Bloom is getting far more showing than her own friends who IMO are much more entertaining. (WHERE IS THAT SCOOTALOO EPISODE, HUH!?)

In terms of this episode, I give it an A-OK. Not one of my favourites and I wouldn't watch it multiple times, but it wasn't bad. The episode DOES have the greatest title AND acronym of all episode titles: TSSCS6K! Lol. Next up is another Rainbow Dash episode, after that the Valentine's Day one with the CMC and a Pinkie one...I do hope a Fluttershy episode comes about soon. Again, NEED SOME FLUTTERSHY!!

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I don't mean that kind of Fluttershy, Dash.

With that above gif, only Pinkie and kind-of Dash haven't been seen asleep in bed. (I'm thinking since Dash can sleep on anything, be it a cloud or a tree, she doesn't have her own bed P:) With Pinkie however, her room seems to have been ret-conned to be much smaller since the babies were born. Simple explanation really, when Spike destroyed her house in Secret of my Excess it was rebuilt with more rooms so there's one for the babies now and Pinkie's room is a lot smaller. That doesn't explain where the hell the Cakes were staying in Party of One, but maybe they sold their house to rebuild the bakery and now live above with Pinkie?? Who knows.

That has all, Spotto out.
spotto: (35)
I wish I could stop using this avatar for tragic news.

Nearly the entire Lokomotiv KHL hockey team perished in a plane crash earlier today, including ex-NHL stars Pavol Demitra, Ruslan Salei, Karlis Skrastins, Brad McCrimmon, as well as Olympic goaltender Stefan Liv who won Gold with Sweden in 2006.

Demitra was an ex-Canuck, who played on the team as recently as a year or so ago, forming a line with either Kesler/Sundin or hanging around the third line due to a shoulder injury. He was exceptional for the Slovakian team in the 2010 Olympics, leading the entire tournament in scoring.

Ruslan Salei was also one of my favourite hockey defensemen and I am deeply saddened by this incident. Only a few weeks ago former Canuck Rick Rypien was found dead among other recent NHL deaths in Wade Belak and Derek Boogaard.

What makes this even more tragic is that an entire hockey team is gone, players, coach, and all. The only survivors, a crewmember, in serious condition, and a single player in critical condition. I hope they both make it. 



R.I.P.

spotto: (35)
My dad just told me he was dead. He was a Vancouver Canuck for six years and had the fastest fists I've ever seen. He also, if I recall, hit like a madman in the playoffs, bouncing people against the boards three or four times in a single forty-second shift. Rest in Peace Ripper. You were an awesome Canuck. 

why

Jun. 16th, 2011 07:16 am
spotto: (FLUTTERSHY)
well the 'nucks lost the cup

so i am drowning myself in ponies

motherfucking ponies

damnit souless

(with a side-dish of touhou, obvs.)
spotto: (35)
 I do not understand anymore. 

The media, the fans, the team itself. I don't get this.

The media pisses me off because they spew a bunch of random crap like "The Canucks are the most hated team in the NHL" while I'm sitting there asking..."Source?" Did they poll the players of the NHL or all the fans and this was the result? They keep ragging on this whole "biting" incident when video evidence shows it as inconclusive. Apparently having one-and-a-half pests on our team means the whole world is against us. I will be honest. I have never been fond of Luongo. Yes, there are many fans that jump on your head and say "You say this after we're trailing 0-4 and not when we win." Well that is a bullshit argument. If we've won we usually don't find things to complain about because we're busy being happy. If we've lost then we want to know what went wrong so we can fix it and not make the same mistakes again!

So the fans piss me off too. 50% will rag on Luongo no matter what. Another 50% will cheer on him no matter what. Were us fans criticized for being the most polarizing fans of the NHL? Do you know what? After forty years of nothing, after year after year of disappointment...how do we even KNOW?
 
How do we even know what to do? In fact I shouldn't even say "we"...how do I KNOW what to do? I always want to stand by this team no matter what. I know a "true" fan will sit in front of the TV watching the agonizing hockey as we let in goals in the two-digits, but why should we do that? Despite what movies seem to have taught us, most of the time, almost all of the time, teams do not come back after massive deficits...especially if this is not the first time such a deficit has occurred.
 
And my parents? I don't really see them as dedicated Canuck fans despite watching longer than I have. The moment today's game started all my dad could do was complain, complain, complain. Even when it was 0-0. Our start was not bad, we just wiffed on chances. Unfortunately wiffing on chances could lead to the loss of the cup, but still...we actually had hunger, had heart at the start. The 8-1 loss? Probably a combination of well, the entire team. The 4-0 loss? Again our defence may not have been there, but I would consider again the entire team since we also did not score. However..when one says the entire team, the GOALTENDER is included too, and today? Those four goals? Three of them in such a short time went by Luongo which could be the easiest saves ever. Then I see, on the other side when the defence messes up and we get breakaways or two-on-ones or empty, gaping nets...the goaltender either saves them or we wiff. We miss, we don't hit the puck, ANYTHING.
 
I don't understand. Why is this so frustrating? People might say, and I may agree with them, that a team like the Canucks do not deserve the cup when you see the lopsided scores but I personally think it's rather unfair too, that their defence can make all the mistakes they want. We can get ALL THE  CHANCES WE WANT, but we cannot finish because they have this amazing goaltender. One who is not cocky, one who does not seem to have much of an ego, can stand on his head every game. While we let the Bruins score such easy goals. To me it's more like the losses we gave up was us making it easy on them rather than us failing horribly. You cannot possibly fail that horribly after such a season, after such a run, and after all that.
 
So really. My question is what is going on? What do I do anymore? I still will watch, even if it's very unlikely to get a goal by that Boston goaltender. I still believe we can win this game, today. But what afterwards? Despite the result, even if we win the next game with Luongo in next...do we still want him next year? I mean apparently we have the best cast of players in franchise history and we still end up having such lopsided scores? Is Kesler injured? Are the Sedins injured? I don't know. There is only so much a Burrows or Lapierre or Hansen or Torres can do. Our top players are not there, our defence is a mess...but we're supposed to be the best right?
 
Why isn't the other team like this too?  They've only lost by one goal. Why is it I only ever see our team doing these things for themselves, and causing such a polarizing opinion on the team, whether it be by the fans, the other fans, the media, or even other teams?  I  don't understand this team.

I certainly hope by the end of this day I'll be happy, or at least on Wednesday, but for now my HOPE  is that we can at least get some goals in, and my FEAR  is that the game does not end 12-0. 
spotto: (35)
One series, four wins. That elusive cup. 17 years waiting. My mom says I first started watching hockey when I was three-years-old, plopped in front of our old Sony TV watching Linden, Bure, Mclean and all those guys almost go all the way. I don't even remember myself watching it, but I will always remember this day.

Hopefully though, today, the gold medal from the Olympics and 1994 will be overshadowed by an even bigger win, an even bigger goal, triumph. No matter who we face, be it Boston or Tampa Bay it will be a hard-fought battle.

But I hope after all this team has gone through, after all this city, province...the biggest trophy in sports will be ours. We are almost there, we have one more obstacle and four wins out of potentially seven games to get there. Vancouver Canucks, this is your year. I believe!

THIS IS WHAT WE LIVE FOR.


Also during the second period when Kesler got injured and we got a powerplay, I was like "BUT WE DON'T HAVE KESLER!" and then my father responded 'That's okay, Hansen can replace him. He's fast enough." I COULD NOT ROLL MY EYES HARD ENOUGH. I don't really need to explain why, but you can't really replace a two-way complete player who went through a forty goal season and carried us through the second round with Hansen. Don't get me wrong, I love Hansen. Speedy, responsible and extremely sharp defensively, BUT HE IS NOT GOING TO BE ON THE POWERPLAY. He's not even on the second unit. He is not an offensive player, not yet I hope, and saying something that like that is stupid beyond...stupid.

Well, complaining after today is silly. GOOD LUCK CANUCKS! I BELIEVE. After forty years, this year could be it!
spotto: (35)
FUCK YEAH CANUCKS

GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK BY ALLOWING THE BLACKHAWKS TO SCORE WITH A MINUTE AND A HALF LEFT IN THE THIRD TO TIE IT AND TAKE IT TO OVERTIME

BUT FUCK YEAH BURROWS FUCK YEAH KESLER

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NASHVILLE IS NEXT!

:|

Apr. 25th, 2011 02:23 pm
spotto: (35)
Okay here's the deal.

Vancouver Canucks vs. Chicago Blackhawks.

The history? We've lost to them twice in the last two playoffs. They won the Stanley Cup last year. A lot of their key players were traded or left via free agency due to cap issues, so this year they only barely made it into the playoffs because Dallas failed. They developed their players by being bottom-feeders for half-a-decade, collecting several high draft picks that instantly made an impact into the NHL. Their original rookie contracts allowed them to have enough cap space for several overachieving players, thus why they won the cup last season. Their group of young, flashy star players give them a lot of media attention, but at the same time the players who have won early went through little hardships compared to a few other teams have caused them to be rather cocky, classless players, probably not all of them but there have been several incidents of unsportsmanlike behaviour from that team.

The Canucks? We've hovered around the top eight for a while, missing once a few years back. We've had to develop players because we never got high draft picks (not since the Sedins, who we had to develop for a few years despite being top two and three overall anyway) and have not gone past the second round since the '94 playoffs. Our core has flourished under our system and this season we've had a dream year, breaking several franchise records and leading in many categories overall in the NHL. Our top two players have won back-to-back Art Ross trophies. The only thing left that still eludes and has been throughout our entire forty-year history is the Stanley Cup.

And yet here we are.

We led 3-0 in the series against the Blackhawks. THREE-ZERO. We only have to win ONE single game to advance to the second round, but now we're in very real danger of being knocked out in the first round. For the entire 10-11 season, we only had our top six defensemen for ONE game, and that was the last game. We finally got to ice them all in this series and our solid, possibly top-core defensemen in the entire league disappear for games four and five, leaving our goaltender out to dry to embarrassing results like 7-2 and 5-0. Our goaltender, long touted as the "saviour of the Canucks" when he arrived, is paid the highest salary among all goaltenders in the league, and has for the third time in the same amount of years, failed against the Blackhawks. The defence may not have been there, but for someone who is considered elite and paid such a huge amount, you'd think he would be better. You'd think the scores would be 2-0 or 4-1 instead.

We decide for once to put our backup in for game six. The backup is a rookie who has played an amazing season for us this year, but to be thrown into the wolves in such a high-pressure game, his anxiety overcomes him. He played well, but due to inexperienced jitters, caused two to go in the net by gaffs behind the net, while overextending and hurting himself during the penalty shot. Injured, we now had to re-insert our expensive number one goaltender.

Our defence decides to play extremely-well defence for the most-part, keeping the Blackhawks to only two shots of the third period. Our goaltender is barely tested if at all, and despite the many shots and chances we had in both the third and overtime, the few chances the Blackhawks get end the game, and they win it in a frustrating 4-3 loss in overtime.

Why?

People say that those who win the cup, deserve to win the cup. You must go through hardships and obstacles and overcome them to win. It was one thing to take a break for a single game, losing 7-2. You would think that such a score would motivate our team to play better and not be embarrassed again the very next game...and yet they did. If the Canucks believe they can take a break for two games and still win a series, they're really pushing their chances. If we win game seven, we will have achieved victory just barely. If we lose, then this playoffs will be the biggest disappointment of franchise history.

Other teams' fans may laugh at us, may make fun of us. I too looked down upon the failures of other teams, but this year when I saw teams like Toronto and Calgary just sink lower and lower, instead of laughing at them I began to have pity. How can management be so ridiculous as to lose two first-round draft picks for Kessel? How can management re-sign Jokinen of all people!? Why do the Calgarian coaches continue to ride Kiprusoff until his engine blows up? I began to miss the hatred and rivalry the Canucks and Flames had, when both teams were of similar skill, but now it feels like we'll be in their shoes too, especially if we lose this next game. Doesn't it seem worse to be so high up in the standings, so strong as a team, but to fail once again for the third time to a team that is only a shadow of its old self? The bigger they are, the harder they fall?

The key here though is the coaching. We keep scratching our four-million dollar defenseman. We keep leaving our goaltenders in long after the game is lost. Why do you pull Luongo at 6-0? Why not at 3-0 (especially after 3 goals in one period) so we still have a chance to win? The purpose of relieving a goaltender is not only to keep the score from being ridiculous, but to also give the team a chance to still climb back up the score. I don't understand the moves the coaching staff makes. You would think things like these would be common sense, and yet I cannot think of one reason why this is. The past two years we have been out-coached by the Blackhawks.

This sense of urgency. This sense of anxiety. The playoffs is never easy. I wish this team would stop treating it this way. At first I thought their businesslike approach to everything was doing well. After all, it gave us that magnificent season, but when the playoffs come, especially against such a hated rival like the Blackhawks...why do you still act business-like? Where is the heart and passion that every winning team requires to reach the top? Torres does not need to deliver a controversial hit every game that could motivate the opponent. The hits the other players on the team had done during the first two games were fine, but ever since that incident it's like the teams switched identities.

I hope for the sake of these players, sake of these coaches (and their jobs), and especially for these fans, those who have been with the team for as long as they were alive that we win game seven. Even if we were first overall in the standings, somehow we have become the underdogs again these last few games, not because of lack of skill, but lack of heart.

I must commend those fans who have followed this team for forty cupless years. I don't know how they do it. I've only been doing so for seven, but this sad, depressing feeling in the pit of my stomach...I don't want to continue feeling like this every single year.
spotto: (Default)
Hockey stuff today.

Not really about the Canucks. After they won in overtime against Phoenix I stuck by the TV to watch the highlights of other games with my dad. The biggest story in hockey at the moment isn't a particular game, but a hit that occurred on Montreal ice yesterday. A player, Max Pacioretty, had his head smashed into the stantion (the panel of glass between the two benches) by Zdeno Chara of the Boston Bruins. Anyone who knows anything about hockey knows that Zdeno Chara is a behemoth of a player, standing at six foot nine. No other player is as tall as him, with the next tallest (I believe) six foot six (Steve Macintyre from the Edmonton Oilers). The average for hockey players appears to be six one or something.

Here's the hit. I must warn anyone who hasn't seen this yet that it is graphic, so watch at your own risk.



Pacioretty fell unconscious as a result, and it's been reported that he has a severe concussion and a fractured vertebrae. Unrelated but interesting to note is that the Bertuzzi-Moore incident occurred on the same day seven years ago, when the Vancouver Canucks were losing 9-0 (or the score was something like that. Perhaps 9-3? Don't remember, not important) and Bertuzzi wanted retribution from Moore after he broke Naslund's leg in an earlier game. He sucker-punched Moore in the back of the head when Moore refused to fight him, which caused a pileup of players trying to get Bertuzzi off him. Moore too suffered a severe concussion and fractured vertebrae. However, he fractured more than just one and supposedly suffers from brain damage that ended his hockey career.

So, why is Spotto bringing this up?

The major discussion for hockey fans at the moment is whether or not that hit was clean. The NHL ruled that there was no intent to injure and there the hit itself wasn't dirty whatsoever. The hit just happened to unfortunately occur at the worst possible place it could, and so rather than a giant headhunting, it was moreso an unfortunate accident thus Chara not being suspended or fined. I've seen the reaction from the Montreal team, they don't really address whether or not it was a dirty hit (which leads me to believe they don't think it was) rather voicing concerns about why such a 90-degree angle stantion is even there.

It is interesting to note that the play itself technically was illegal, in that it was interference, since the puck was long gone from Pacioretty's stick, but again the debate is whether or not the hit itself is legal or not. The NHL has spoken, and the majority of Montreal fans too have spoken. The ruling from the NHL has outraged many Canadiens fans who believe that it was a dirty, intentional hit. There is a still-shot of the incident that exists that they claim proves Chara had intent to injure. Here's the (again, rather graphic) image:



So, now with all the facts out of the way...and after all the responses I've observed, I've come to this conclusion:

I think the best angle to watch this hit would be the one from the Boston feed. They show the view from the benches rather than from the ice. Now basically, is Chara watching Pacioretty as he hits him, or is his head facing the play? If it were the former, it may be evidence that it was indeed intentional, but the latter would mean he's just finishing his check, not paying attention that the stantion is even there, moreso focused on the game. The angle isn't really that great, since the camera seems quite far from the two players, but from what I can see it does look like Chara's eyes are strictly on the puck, so all he did was push Pacioretty. It's still quite hard to tell though. You can possibly argue he was watching Pacioretty while pushing him into the stantion. The other angle that is often seen seems to drive the point further. His eyes are only set on the puck.

So in my opinion there wasn't intent. First of all, I've known this guy's name since I've started following hockey heavily. (He's been playing for thirteen years!) I don't have too much of an opinion of the player himself. All I know is that he is the biggest hockey player ever, has the hardest shot ever, and that he plays on Boston. He was the leading candidate for the Norris Trophy this year (for best defenseman) so he's talented. Not once though have I heard his name being involved with a dirty incident. I've heard Cooke, I've heard Avery, Pronger, but not Chara. I have a friend of mine, a huge Montreal fan who would probably disagree with me right now. After all, Boston and Montreal have an ugly rivalry, one that surpasses many nasty rivalries that might exist here out west. Certainly a team I dislike greatly, like Chicago, if one of their players did something like that to a Canuck, well I'll probably be enraged too. I'll probably immediately jump to the conclusion that there was intent because I don't believe the players on Chicago are particularly classy.

But in the end, I just can't honestly see a person, especially a hockey player, really have the intent to take a guy's head off. Sure Bertuzzi was angry that Naslund was injured by a Colorado player, and he probably wanted to punch him in the head, since he did. I don't think he intended to end his entire career or cause brain damage, of all things. And the Bertuzzi-incident is completely different from this one. It was very clear what he did was wrong. This on the other hand was an incident that happened so fast people could barely think before they act. Consider that Chara did see that stantion there? Is his first thought going to be "I'm going to smash this guy's head off?".

I do however disagree with how the league handled it. His punishment probably shouldn't have been severe, but I would've at least given him a couple of games. You have to be responsible for your actions after all, even if you don't intend them to happen. That's what involuntary manslaughter is, isn't it? You do something stupid, and someone gets hurt. You didn't want them to get hurt, but Chara did deliver a late hit, and he should remember that he towers above other people and therefore his strength will be stronger than someone else's. A simple nudge from him could do a lot more to someone else than an average-sized NHL player. I also don't like how he responded to that incident. He simply skated away. He never checked if Pacioretty was okay, and from his tweets he doesn't even sound very concerned about the player, simply stating that the stantion was there and that players would run into them. I don't really think Pacioretty would be so clumsy as to run into one all by himself. It's very clear that if Chara was not there his head would not be smashing into a stantion. How many times has someone run into that thing by himself?

Also please don't do ridiculous things like call the cops and complain, Habs fans. (Just read an article that Montreal fans clogged emergency lines filing criminal complaints on Zdeno Chara :\)

As always, best wishes to Max Pacioretty in a complete and speedy recovery. Hopefully he can return to hockey!

BOLD are for tl;dr people. :P
spotto: (Crimson Red)
I didn't get it.

I got there at 10:30, saw only like two people there. Came back at around 1pm, no one was there--went inside, needed a voucher...no more vouchers.

FFS. I was hanging around for bloody four hours and didn't get what I came for. @_@

On the bright side I was with a bunch of other fans hanging around the underground parking exit and I instead got five other Canucks' signatures:
Glass
Tambellini
Hodgson
Tanev
and EHRHOFF!

It kind of makes sense how the fourth liners don't mind signing as much, and I truly hope Hodgson blossoms into a superstar, because unlike the rest of the fourth line he might be the only one remaining here and I want to have current Canucks' autographs on my hat! Also because Hodgson has great potential, 'tis a shame if it doesn't work out.

Oh and Ehrhoff. Yeah. I may get a jersey of his next if he resigns...

I COULD'VE gotten Henrik's or Alberts', but I had to borrow a pen and thus be one of the last ones to get the autograph and both of them didn't sign everyone's...thus more disappointment. :\ HAVE A SHARPIE WHEREVER YOU GO SPOTTO!

I suppose there's always next time, even if I did get five other Canucks' autographs I still feel disappointed. :C A Kesler autograph on a Kesler jersey, I'll obtain it next time you hear me!!

On the other hand I saw basically every Canucks except Luongo and Hansen that day, driving out. (I think he came out later and I was already lining up--moot point though. FFFFFF)

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