Ph34r my boredom.

I be bored:

Once upon a time…

BRRRRRRING!!!!!!!!! BRRRRRRRING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Random girl: OMG! FIRE! FIRE! THE DORMS ARE BURNING!!!!

Random fireman: GET EVERYBODY OUT OF THE BUILDING, STAT!

*A bunch of firemen storm into the building*

Meanwhile, on the 5th floor…

Chisame: Argh, what’s that annoying ringing noise!? Can’t they see I’m doing a complicated photoshock job and cannot be disturbed at the moment!?

*turns her head to see Kazumi sleeping peacefully on her bed*

Chisame: What a deep sleeper. I wish I could sleep like that.

A puff of smoke entered the room, and Chisame obviously noticed the ugly scent of such monoxide.

Chisame: The hell!? *gets up and walks towards the door, but it slams open before she reaches it*

Fuuka: *standing at the doorway* There’s a fire!!!! GET OUT OF HERE AND RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!

Chisame: …I better save that psd file onto a disk then.

Asuna: *runs in* NO TIME! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!!

Chisame: …well, if I suffer burns it’ll be even harder to edit it out with photoshock *notices Kazumi still sleeping peacefully in her bed* WAKE THE HELL UP!

Kazumi: Mmhm…oh yeah…that’s right…

Chisame: …what in internet’s name is she dreaming about!?

Kazumi: You like it there…don’t you?

Chisame: WAKE UP FROM YOUR PERVERTED DREAM OR DIE, KAZUMI ASAKURA!!

Kazumi: *one eye opens* Eh? What is it, Chiu-Chiu?

Chisame: Don’t call me Chiu-Chiu, you sleazy who--

Asuna: HOW MANY TIMES MUST WE TELL YOU TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!? THAT’S IT. I DON’T CARE, I’M GETTING OUT OF HERE MYSELF! SEE YA! *runs off*

Kazumi: *confuzzled* What’s going on?

Chisame: That must be the first time you’ve ever said that phrase, you damned reporter.

Kazumi: No, actually the second, I said it once a bit before, and--

Chisame: Oh for god’s sakes, the doorway is in flames now. THIS IS BECAUSE OF YOU!

Kazumi: So? There’s a perfectly intact window right over there. The door is overrated. It’s not the only way to get out of here.

Chisame: You do realize that we’re on the FIFTH FLOOR AND IF WE GO OUT THE WINDOW WE’LL FALL DOWN FIVE STOREYS!?

Kazumi: If you hesitate, you’ll get burnt, Chiu-Chiu~ ;)

Chisame: I hate you.

Kazumi: Well if you’re too afraid to jump out the window, I’ll leap out of there holding you while you SCREAM AND STRUGGLE!!!

Chisame: THAT’S SUICIDE! I RATHER BURN IN THE FLAMES THAN DIE LIKE THAT!

Kazumi: *devilish grin* Who says that’s going to happen? *grabs Chisame’s waist and drags her towards the window*

Chisame: I’M WARNING YOU, ASAKURA, I CAN CHARGE YOU FOR SEXUAL HARRASSMENT YOU F**KING WHORE!

Kazumi: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. :)

Chisame: Maybe, but the CONCRETE GROUND WILL PROBABLY KILL US!

Sayo: *flies through a wall* Why haven’t you guys gotten out yet?

Chisame: BECAUSE THIS BITCH IS GOING TO KILL US ALL!

Sayo: Gasp! That’s a bad word Chisame! O:

Chisame: Yeah, wonderful thing to be concerned about when we’re in a burning building.

Kazumi: ARE YOU READY, CHIU-CHAN!?

Chisame: I swear I will stick your head on a pike when we go to hell.

Sayo: Or maybe you’ll become ghosts like me! Yay! ^^

Chisame: Sayo, you’re such a hopeless ghos— *suddenly is out the window…and falling!*

Chisame: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WTF ASAKURA! YOU INSANE BIT-

Sayo: Not another bad word! *covers Chisame’s mouth as they fall*

Everything suddenly blacks out.

-

Chisame: *opens her eyes to a white room* Am I in hell?

Negi: Hello Chisame! Glad you’re awake!

Chisame: Nope, this is worst than hell.

Negi: You miraculously survived that fall with few injuries, Chisame-san!

Chisame: I did? How’s that possible?

Negi: Asakura-san broke your fall. *suddenly goes quieter* …what a hero…

Chisame: Wait, what? After everything I said to her? She saved my life? What happened to her?

Negi: I’m afraid she’s…

Chisame: …WHAT!?

Negi: She’s…gone.

Chisame: Oh no…

Negi: Gone to ARBY’S that is! What a horrible restaurant with such distasteful service! Why did you have to go THERE for lunch, Asakura!?

Chisame: …

Negi: Oh yeah, and she has more injuries than you. There’s an Arby’s at the ground floor of this hospital. Hm, how ironic…

Chisame: And how did SHE survive!?

Negi: Oh, I don’t know, who cares anyway. The important thing is that ARBY’S IS AN EVIL RESTAURANT AND NOW I MUST SAVE HER FROM TAKING A BITE OF THAT NASTY FOOD!!! *runs off*

Chisame: Bah. I might as well wander around.

-

IN ARBY’S

Yuuna: And so the cop told me NOT to play with fire while building tank models. I MEAN HOW CAN YOU HAVE A FUN TIME WITH WAX SOLDIERS WITHOUT BURNING THEM IN THE MIDST OF WAR!?

Ako: You’re just lucky they didn’t file charges against you for burning down the dorms. Wait, why the hell are we eating at Arby’s?

Yuuna: Because for some reason this is the only food the hospital is offering us.

Akira: We got to get out of here.

Ako: Agreed.

*at the table beside them…*

Fuuka: The food sucks!

Fumika: This is worst than momma’s cooking! D:

Fuuka: *notices Asakura out like a light across from them at the table* Hey, she’s in a wheelchair, what do you say we push her down the stairs?

Fumika: Um…

Fuuka: C’mon! It’s her fault for falling asleep here!

Fumika: …okay…

Fuuka & Fumika: WONDER TWIN POWERS ACTIVATE!

Fuuka: Form of…MISCHIEVOUS NINJA!

Fumika: Form of…mischievous ninja’s scroll…

*They run off pushing Kazumi somewhere*

Negi: *runs down to Arby’s* I MUST SAVE YOU ALL FROM THE FOOD OF SATAN!!!

Chisame: *walks in after* …society is f**ked.

Misora: FOOD OF SATAN!? THIS IS FOOD OF SATAN!? MY GOODNESS! I HAVE SINNED! I better go with the twins to push the paparazzi bitch off the stairs then.

Natsumi: Um…wouldn’t that be sinning as well?

Misora: Yes well…I’ll resent it after. *runs off*

Chisame: Even though she is annoying, I’m not letting them push that damned reporter down the stairs because she, I must admit, saved my god forsaken life.

Ako: SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW, NET IDOL!?

Chisame: Shut the hell up, scarface.

Ako: It’s on my BACK, my BACK you moron!

Chisame: Whatever, not like I can tell the difference.

Group of hospitalized students: Ooooooooooh

Ako: Ah, so you actually NEED to get glasses that work this time, don’t you?

Group of hospitalized students: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH

Chisame: It’s not like they HIDE my face, unlike you!

Group of hospitalized students: Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasp

Ako: Don’t be a hypocrite, you always hide everything. Everybody knows you’re the ruler of the internet, which is full of n00bs anyway. Who wants to be the ruler of a bunch of gullible perverted idiots?

Chisame: WHY YOU-

Kazumi: *from a distance* KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

CRASH!

Chisame: Son of a bitch!

Yuuna: Wow Ako, you’re great at distracting people.

Ako: And you’re great at burning things. Please burn down the hospital.

Negi: BECAUSE IT POSSESSES THE FOOD OF SATAN!

Yue: *walks in from a hallway* I believe I have just heard the sound of a girl falling down the stairs on a wheelchair, an argument between an albino and net-slut, and a bunch of false oohs made to make the scene more dramatic.

Yuuna: YES, THANK YOU. WE ALL NEEDED A REVIEW OF WHAT JUST HAPPENED YUE.

Yue: That’s not it. These turn of events must mean that…

Asuna: It is the signal of the BAKA RANGERS!

Kaede: Which brings us, the great sentai of Mahora…

Ku Fei: To come at the students aid, since we are the…

Makie: BAKA RANGE--

Sakurako: Can we make waffles?

Makie: …

Misa: WAFFLES ARE TOO UNORIGINAL NOW!

Sakurako: …can we make terrorist bombs?

Madoka: I must admit, terrorist bombs are much more crunchy than waffles. Just look what it did to my teeth! *grins to show broken teeth*

Group of hospitalized students: Ooooooooooooooooooooh…

Chao: As a terrorist revolutionist, I SHALL SUPPLY THE BOMBS-ne!

Yuuna: WHAT!? BOMBS!? DID YOU SAY BOMBS!? OMGOMGOMG *runs around like a jackal* GIVE THEM TO ME! I WILL USE THEM RESPONSIBLY AND CAREFULLY!!!!!

Chao: Sure! I know you will! ^^ *gives them to Yuuna*

Yuuna: Heheheheh. Things will now go BOOM!

BOOM!

-

Haruna: So, that’s the story of how we’re all going to die. All in this nice manga of us!

Yue: That’s the most retarded manga you’ve ever drawn Haruna. Why is there so much Chisame in it and so less Yue?

Nodoka: …where am I? ):

Haruna: HEY, I SUPPORT CHISAMEXKAZUMI, YOU CAN’T CHANGE MY VIEWS! D:

Yue: …you pair up your own classmates?

Haruna: Oh yeah. My favourite pairing is YueXNodoka.

Yue & Nodoka: …

Haruna: IN FACT, I EVEN DREW A HENTAI DOUJIN OF IT!

Yue: O_____O

Nodoka: *about to faint*

Ayaka: *runs into the room* GUYS! GUYS! GET OUT OF THE DORMS! YUUNA SET IT ON FIRE BECAUSE SHE WAS PLAYING WITH HER STUPID ARMY TOYS!!!

*bells starts ringing*

Chisame: *can be heard from the other room* Argh, what’s that annoying ringing noise!? Can’t they see I’m doing a complicated photoshock job and cannot be disturbed at the moment!?

Yue & Nodoka: O________________O

Haruna: Wow, so it actually came true.

Nodoka: We’re going to die. I must go seduce Negi before then, then.


Yue: OI!!!!!

Ayaka: I’M COMING TOO!!!! O:

Zazie: The End. Oh look, no Setsuna or Konoka anywhere. No Konosetsu at all.

Konoka: SECCHAN! I LOVE YOU! HAVE MY BABIES!

Setsuna: No, Konoka, I am not worthy enough. I do request however, that you have my babies, for you will give them the greatest and most perfect genes in existence.

Konoka: Aww, let’s go run away and get married then, Secchan!

Setsuna: Yes, Ojou-sama!

Zazie: …well, it didn’t have KazumiXSayo.

Sayo: NOOOOOOOO! KAZUMI IS DEAD! SOMEONE PUSHED HER OFF THE STAIRS! DD: *hugging the dead Kazumi* I’ve always loved you, Kazumi, I really did. T__________T

Ghost Kazumi: OMG! I LOVED YOU TOO!

Sayo: HOLY CRAP! A GHOST! *dies*

Ghost Kazumi: …OH NOES!!! I KILLED SAYO!! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Zazie: …ffs. THE END.

-

Screw the R-P0T3, =D