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spottoSchool's in six hours. DDD:
Chapter 26: TWENTY SIX! OMGZ!
… daddy doesn’t remember us-aru. I don’t know what’s wrong, but he came back from hunting and got this big scratch on his head-aruyo! My little brother idolized him a lot, and when he came up to our mommy, and then asked her to get out of his territory…it didn’t help that food was running out, and we had to get out or he’d kill us…it was scary-arune.
We found out a few days later that the scratch on his head was driving him insane-aru. (He also said my constant use of ‘aru’ was making him crazy too, that made me sad-aruka) He learned from a few animals what tigers believed in, and felt it made sense, so went to face the dragon-aru. That was the last time we heard of him-aruyo.
”Hey…Kuu…wake the hell up…”
”Y-Yuuna…aru?”
The tiger blinked twice and rubbed her eyes, slowly her vision cleared. Getting up, the feline noticed they were in a cave.
Wow, we’re in caves a lot, aren’t we-aruyo?
The otter crossed her paws; she was leaning against the wall of the cave, her leg still in a serious mess. The slender mammal was also the only one actually conscious before the wildcat awoke, who was bewildered.
Yuuna inhaled deeply, “I suppose you’re wondering what just happened.”
”You read my mind-aru.”
”We were on the dragon, and I don’t know HOW we were on the dragon…it just magically came under us or something…and I woke up. I saw you going insane on the dragon’s head and eyes, which in turn went insane on you, blowing a strong gust towards us as we all flew off the dragon’s back. I think the wind knocked you out. We landed in a cave…except you, you landed on…Kazumi.” The otter pointed at the canary lying near the corner, looking rather…flat.
Ku Fei looked at the unconscious and relatively…deformed canary.
”So I landed on Kazumi-aru.”
”Indeed.”
”And she isn’t dead-aruka?”
”Amazingly, she isn’t.”
”Wow-aru.”
”I know.”
The tiger stretched a bit and then looked around. She could still hear the dragon roaring in the distance and assumed they weren’t out of danger at all. She turned to look at the canary who looked like a pancake, and noticed that two of the letter ‘X’ replaced her eyes, and her tongue was sticking out.
”What are we, in a cartoon-aruyo?”
Suddenly a voice spoke up, “What’s a cartoon?”
Ku Fei turned around, and heard Ako had woken up from that question.
”When the humans look at a box, what they see is sometimes a cartoon-aruyo! It’s pretty stupid too, like anvils falling on the heads of animals or people and no one dies-aru. I see Chisame watch stuff like that sometimes…”
”What’s an anvil?”
The tiger thought, “Huh, I’m not entirely sure-aru!”
”HOLY (BLEEP!)” Yuuna was heard cussing from deeper into the cave, “Come ‘ere!!!”
The others rushed towards the otter. Ku Fei had brought Kazumi with her in the tiger’s mouth, “What is it…aru?”
They looked up at the massive towering, and leaning, heap of bones, which seemed to come from a large variety of animals, some the creatures there couldn’t even figure out what animal they actually were. It seemed that they had landed into the cave where the dragon ate its meal. It soon became apparent that they were its next meal.
”So we basically found the dead bodies…or what’s left of them…here?” Yuuna said. She felt the soft plumage of Ako touch her fur as the younger bird hugged the otter in fear.
Ku Fei asked, “I thought your leg was screwed up. How’d you walk here-aru?”
”I crawled, and was bored…I even found some nice cloth on one of these bones to wrap around it,” She pointed at a human-looking skeleton.
The cat looked at the older bird, and decided to try something she had saw on the big box before, though didn’t expect it to work, “Okay, let’s see-aruka…”
She put her mouth on the canary’s beak, and blew. Suddenly the bird inflated to its normal size, surprising everybody present.
”Nice, Kuu!” Yuuna said, “…and if Haruna was here, she’d be making lots of pictures of what you just did, talking about kisses and whatnot!”
“Kisses-aru? What’s that?”
”Eh? You’re not Ako. You should know.”
Ako, all of a sudden, explained, “A kiss is when two beings press their mouths together. This is often the best way to show your partner your utmost intense love.”
”…okay, that was weird.”
”Eh!? I don’t love Kazumi-aru! Well, I do, in food sense, but don’t you get any misunderstandings from that-aruyo! I’m not in the mood for canary pancakes-aru!” Ku Fei suddenly shouted loudly, shaking her paw. The paw bashed into the pile of bones, causing for the mountain of death to tumble down upon the animals present.
”KYAAAA! Kuu, you idiot!”
Ku Fei chuckled, “Oops-aru?”
They helped each other out of the pile and dusted themselves off.
Yuuna sighed in relief, “Good thing we didn’t get hurt from that, right Kuu?”
No response.
”…Ku Fei?”
The otter turned around and saw the tiger staring deeply at one of the bones, specifically a skull. Yuuna slowly crawled up to the wildcat, also looking at the skull, wondering why the animal stopped to gaze upon it.
Yuuna exclaimed, “Oh! It looks like a tiger’s skull! Hm, it’s got that crack on its head, though…”
”That’s not a crack-aru! That’s…my dad’s severe head injury…”
”Wait, you mean that skull is your…”
A melancholy look appeared in the tiger’s eyes as she nodded, yet didn’t look at the otter, not taking her eyes off the skull. Yuuna frowned and an understanding expression came upon the otter. She turned around, grabbing Ako’s wing, and walking off, or at least trying, away from the tiger.
”Where are we going?” The innocent bird questioned.
Yuuna looked at the distance, “We should leave Kuu alone for now.”
-
Setsuna the swordscrane flew into the air, looking around the forest from her excellent view. Suddenly, a voice echoed into her head, one voice that she’d always listen to, one voice who had the greatest authority throughout the entire forest.
Setsuna-kun, are you there?
Chief Eishun!?
Hello Setsuna-kun, we’re in a bit of a crisis. I can’t explain right here, but I request for you to bring Konoka back to the koala trees as soon as possible.
How are you communicating with me?
We aren’t called Kansai Magic Association for nothing, Setsuna-kun.
I apologize but I cannot obey your orders at the moment, for Ojou-sama and I are searching for her child…
Ah, so Konoka finally settled down and got a mate?
Erm, not exactly…
Hmm? She is the heir, so she should find a mate as soon as possible. Survival means making more of your own kind…
It’s kind of a long story, chief, but we happened to adopt an animal. She immediately called us her parents once she was born, as her mother disappeared.
Unfortunately you would have to find her later, for the sake of Konoka and even you; you must bring her here immediately. We’ll dispatch koalas to find the missing creature once you get here and explain.
It’s kind of complicated, chief…
Setsuna, please, it’s for the safety of Konoka. You are her guardian.
Alright! For Ojou-sama, we’re coming back right now!
Thank you, Setsuna-kun.
The crane flew back down to the ground, in front of the animal she had been protecting for a long time now. She bowed and finally got to her point.
”Your father summons us back home,” she said.
Konoka shook her head, “I don’t care what the problem is, but I’m not going back until we find Ako!”
”Ojou-sama…it’s dangerous…there is a problem back home…”
”Of course it’s dangerous! That’s why we have to find Ako or something really bad might happen!!!”
Haruna was bouncing on top of a tree branch, how she got up there no one knew.
”OOOH! I SEE SOMETHING! I SEE A GIGANTIC LIZARD THING AND I’M THIRTY CENTIMETRES FROM ITS EYE!”
”WHAT!?”
-
The fox turned around, hearing a familiar scream, “Hm. That sounded like that penguin…”
”I believe your friends found them first-ne,” Chao stepped aside, “In that case, you can go.”
Chisame twitched, “What!? That’s it!? I can go!?!?! Just because THEY FOUND THEM FIRST!?”
”Well if you had just stayed with them you never would have bumped into me,” the panda responded.
”But why let me go NOW!?”
”They passed the test. Survive until found was basically it. Now I know what I’m dealing with, yo. Now go ahead and leave, just because they found them doesn’t mean they’re out of danger, ne!” Chao said, and then walked off into the distance.
The fox called, “Wait! You’re not going to do anything ruthless, are you!?”
”Oh, the time will come when we meet again, Chisame-chan…”
”Don’t call me chan! We’re not friends!”
”Are we-ne? I’m the only one here who knows your secret, fox,” the panda then disappeared.
The only animal left was the fox, feeling as if she could do nothing. The vixen ran off towards the dragon’s direction, deciding to forget today’s ordeal…
-
Yuuna peaked out of the cave and saw the dragon standing right in front of the entrance. She had heard of a shriek from an animal, which sounded familiar but she couldn’t remember where it came from for some reason. The dragon then lifted its head; a round little plump penguin could be seen inside the hanging jaws…
”Holy (bleep!) HARUNA!”
”UWAH!! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING!?!?” Haruna yelled, “GWAH!”
Yue noted, “Okay, so mythical dragons aren’t very mythical anymore.”
The dragon was about to snap the arctic bird in half when a tiger leapt out of the cave, soaring onto the head of the dragon with her fangs smashing onto the hard skin of the oversized lizard’s nose, causing it to cry out. Ku Fei did not say anything, all she did was roar.
”It’s Ku Fei!” Nodoka pointed, as the other animals watched on.
The dragon attempted to shake the tiger off of it as its head moved from side to side violently, knocking trees down. Ku Fei’s jaw was tightly on the nose and didn’t show any signs of easing off, as if her attack was quite personal. The shaking dragon couldn’t seem to get the tiger off of it but Haruna managed to fall out of its mouth, falling towards the hard soil below…
Yuuna growled, “Damnit! I can’t reach her in time!”
Sayo looked around, Kazumi was unconscious, Ako would obviously look the same as Kazumi was when Ku Fei fell on her if she tried to catch the penguin, and the otter was far too slow with her injury. Thinking fast, the spirit dived into the otter, possessing her.
”I feel a serge of POWER!” Yuuna shouted, as she pumped her fist into the air. The otter ran and jumped into the sky, falling on her stomach as she slid down a small hill, doing an acrobatic back flip as she flew off the hill, and caught the penguin midair. Sayo couldn’t hold onto her host and was forced to leave the body of the otter. The two animals crashed into the soil hard, but Yuuna had broken the penguin’s fall.
”Oww…why and how did do that!?” Yuuna mumbled.
”YOU HAVE SAVED ME!” Haruna yelled, “THIS CALLS FOR A CRACK PAIRING!”
She took out a stick and started craving pictures onto a log nearby. She then noticed three slashes on her stomach. They weren’t deep, but weren’t too light either, enough to give a sting.
”A BATTLE SCAR! AWESOME! THIS CALLS FOR A CRACK PAIRING!”
Yue asked, “What? What does an injury have to do with that!?”
”Well duh, Yue/Haruna’s battle scar, silly.”
”…I’m a little disturbed that you even said that in third-person.”
Ku Fei was still busy attacking the dragon, which had clawed the tiger countless times, but didn’t seem the faze her. The other animals started getting worried that Ku Fei may have gone insane and not even cared about her own life.
Ako noticed the bones behind her as she watched on in anxiousness. She picked up a bone and tried to toss it at the dragon but it didn’t go far. Finally, the canary got up, noticing that she had missed a little of the action…again.
”Damn that Ku Fei! She fell on me! My insides feel weird!” Kazumi said.
”THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT YOU DUMB CANARY! I’M LYING HERE DEFENSELESS AND WITH THAT GREEN THING’S FOOT GOING ALL OVER THE PLACE I MIGHT GET CRUSHED!!!” Yuuna cried.
Kazumi rubbed her chin, “Ah, I have a solution for you, young otter! Perhaps you could try MOVING!”
”I CAN’T MOVE! MY LEG IS SWISS CHEESE!”
There was a sudden crunch sound as they all looked up; the dragon had bitten right into Ku Fei’s shoulder blade. The sound did not seem pretty.
”We got to help Ku Fei-san!” Ako said, “Oneechan, can you throw those bones far at it?”
Kazumi looked at the bones lying behind them, “That’s a good idea, Ako! Nice job!”
She picked up a rib with her working wing, “DIE DRAGON!” The rib flew into the air and smashed right into the dragon’s head, causing it to snap backwards, and flinging the tiger off him. Ku Fei landed on her feet on the ground, but she was not intact.
The dragon was now furious, and it was prepared the squash Yuuna and Ku Fei like a bug until a fox came running into the scene in front of the two wounded animals. It was Chisame, who was very angry. She growled and narrowed her eyes at the dragon.
”Chisame! What are you doing!? You’re no match for that dragon-aru!” Ku Fei started, “Let me at it-aruyo!!!”
The fox raised her paw up in front of the tiger, signalling her to go no further, “I’ve got this handled you dumb cat. Don’t worry.”
The mythical beast placed its foot down in front of the fox, and as if it were listening to the canine’s orders, it started flapping its wings, rising into the air, and flying into the distance, confusing many of the animals present.
Akashi quickly ran to his daughter lying on the ground, “Yuuna! Are you alright!? Who told you to go running off like that!? I should’ve expected it…”
”Dad! That thing was what ate and killed the otters! We have to kill it!” Yuuna exclaimed.
”No Yuuna, it eats meat, so it obviously would eat us. Not only are we no match for it, killing it will prove no point.”
Yuuna thought, “But then we could try dragon meat! YUM! Maybe even get that squirrel to make DRAGON NIKUMAN for us! That’d be intensely yummy! WE COULD EVEN SELL THEM SUPER-CHEAP! Think of it! Super-cheap and intensely yummy DRAGON NIKUMAN!1”
”Erm…”
Yue raised her eyes, looking at the fox, “I wonder why the dragon listened to Chisame-san? There might be something about her we don’t know.”
”AHA! CRACK PAIRING NUMBER THREE! CHISAME/YUE!”
”Shut up Haruna!”
Chisame sighed, “I guess I’ll take you to the vet. Stupid animals making expensive vet bills…”
”Ako-chan! We have to go back to our old home! Come meet your grandpa, teehee!” Konoka said, putting the chick onto Setsuna’s back.
”O-Ojou-sama! This is serious! We must hurry!”
The three animals headed for the direction of kappa forest while Chisame brought the rest back to the farm, and some to the vet. As the sun started to set on the horizon, the day had finally ended for the animals. There seemed to be persisting threats to the animals, who all continued to survive…
-
Chisame: Fah, the omakes are predictable. Something incredibly stupid happens and then in the end those two idiots *points at Yuuna and Kazumi* get hurt, and then magically get better next omake. I AM CANCELLING THIS OMAKE!
Ku Laozi: NOOOOOOO-ARU! I HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR THIS OMAKE-ARUYO!
Sayo: YOU’RE AN ACTRESS! NOT THE MANAGER! LET THE SHOW GO ON!
Chisame: Damn idiots.
Haruna: So what’s the special thing for this omake, Ku Laozi!? *eager stare*
Ku Laozi: WE WILL REENACT THE ABOVE CHAPTER IN XEBEC STYLE! We will now don ANIMAL COSTUMES-ARU!
Chisame: WHAT!? Hell no! I’m not getting into a ridiculous costume!
Sayo: You have to. You signed the contract to sell your soul to ME.
Chisame: I DID NO SUCH THING!
Sayo: When one of my lackeys did it with your hand in your sleep.
Misora: I am not your lackey! And if I have to be one, can I be the MYSTERIOUS lackey!?
Chisame: Grrr. *gets into a fox costume* This is incredibly moronic.
Sayo: ACTION!
Yuuna: *in otter costume* Oh noooo, a dragon. What will we do?
Kazumi: *in chicken costume, no canary one was available* I don’t know Yuuna, looks like we’re going to die, woohoo.
Ako: *in chick costume* But oneechan, I am very scared…
Ku Fei: *in tiger costume* I AM ANGRY THAT IT KILLED MY FATHER-ARU! I WILL NOW AVENGE HIM-ARUYO! RAWR!
Misora: *Fate was not available, so it’s a dragon plush being held by Misora* MWAHAHAHA! But I am really the devil! AND YOU *points randomly at Haruna* WILL DIE SOON because it’s been TEN YEARS! You signed a contract to not DO MAGIC!! NOW YOU WILL DIE! MWAHAHAHA!
Haruna: *in a penguin costume* OH NOES!
Kazumi: I KNOW A SOLUTION! We must all kiss Chisame because she is all powerful and stuff! SO WE GET TO HAVE AWESOME POWERS!
Chisame: HELL NO! I AM NOT LETTING YOU KISS ME!
Kazumi: TOO BAD!
Sayo: (Narrator) And so, the canary, tiger, otter, and chick proceeded to kiss the fox, gaining awesome powers that don’t make any sense. Then commenced the great amount of crack pairings created. Also that Yuuna and Ako shared an INDIRECT KISS OMGZ. Anyway…
Chisame: BLARGH!
Yuuna: Now I HAVE AWESOME EYEBEAM POWERS! PSHEW! PSHEW! *makes crappy sound effects*
Misora: (Dragon) Oh noes! The eyebeam hurts! That doesn’t make any damned sense!
Kazumi: AND I HAVE THE AWESOME POWER TO FLASH YOU BLIND!
Misora: (Dragon, OOC) WHUT!? YOU’RE GOING TO SHOW YOURSELF NAKED TO ME!? ISN’T THIS A KIDS PROGRAM!?!?
Kazumi: THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!! *takes out camera* SEE!?
Misora: (Dragon, OOC) AND YOU’RE GOING TO TAKE PICTURES!?!? AAAAHHHHHH!!!
Sayo: (Narrator, OOC) You’re not reading the script, and I’ll have you know she looks very hot naked—err…continuing on.
Ku Fei: AND I HAVE THE POWER OF MARTIAL ARTS-ARU! *jumps at the dragon*
Haruna: Don’t you already have that?
Ku Fei: That’s how BADASS I am-aruyo!
Sayo: (Narrator, OOC) Now stop dry humping the plushie and let’s get on with it!
Ku Fei: HEY!
Ako: And I have the power of um…throwing my guitar at you?
CRASH!!!
Yuuna: Holy (bleep!) YOU KNOCKED OUT MISORA!
Sayo: (Narrator) And then they went back to the present and did something under a gigantic tree where the treaty was called off and everybody was happy, the end. Oh, and Haruna was dead but they changed the past and now she’s not.
Ku Fei: *dons beard* NOW I AM KU LAOZI THE WISE TIGER-ARU! And today’s lesson is that if you kids ever want to go into the animation business, DON’T DO WHAT XEBEC DID! OR EVERYBODY WILL HATE YOU-ARUYO!
Kazumi: Now LET’S GO KILL XEBEC!
Everybody else, even Chisame: YAY!!!
Yuuna: *accidentally pulls a random string on Kazumi’s chicken costume and it falls apart*
Misora: OH MY GOD YOU DID FLASH ME! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Ako: Aren’t you unconscious?
Misora: …I got better?
Ku Fei: That joke doesn’t work unless it’s ‘dead’-aruyo. *shakes her head*
Kazumi: I knew I shouldn’t have worn the suit from the sex shop…
END TRANSMISSION.
-
1 – Yuuna ACTUALLY said this quote (besides dragon, obviously) in the manga:
Anyway, yoosh, there were several random crack hints this chapter. (Kazumi/Ku Fei, Haruna/Yuuna, Chisame/Yue, Yue/Haruna’s battle scar, Chisame/A Harem, Ku Fei/a dragon plushie…yep.) And yes it’s ironic that Misora was acting as the devil…but whatever.
AND TEH FANART!!!!
HFF stuff. Drew this a couple days ago, better than the other group picture I drew...xD
And this is some more designs of Dogger characters...chibi ones, lol. I'm not satisfied with Sayo and will probably change her, Dogger herself will stay the same most likely and the other two may get minor changes. 
S'wootniks!
R-POTE: Kaede/Akira
I is teh Kirami.
Date: 2007-09-07 11:21 am (UTC)I don't remember you telling me xDD;
Anyway.
I like teh Dogger pictures best.
Cat is my favourite.
And Dogger's outfit isn't over done xD
So don't worry : D
So, if Kazumi is the canary, who's the other birdie o: ?
And whut birdie issit O: ?
Thar. I just retyped all of that.
Perhaps you can give Cat a bell, just like the one Chiu has xD ?
Stupid going-back-button-thingy D<